Things We Took for Granted
by StardustSage
Summary: Part I -- After three years of humanization, Zim is forced to deal with the consequences. .:ZADR:. In the process of being rewritten.
1. Part 1

"You'll never catch me, Dib-stink!" called the Irken behind his back, still running as fast as he could. Being chased into the middle of the city meant that he couldn't just use his PAK's legs to get away. Still, he could run just as fast as Dib, so as long as he didn't get tired...

"That's what you think, Zim!" the boy shot back, sprinting with all his might. Dib was huffing, exhausted, his trench coat was trailing behind him, flapping in the wind. Zim was weaving in and out of alleyways, through crowds, doing everything to try and shake him off. But Dib was not one to mess around. He would catch that alien, no matter what. Today would be the day.

Just like it had been for the past three years.

Gratuitous amounts of stolen human growth hormone had kept Zim and Dib the same height, which by earth standards was actually pretty tall. They both had the same lanky features, however Zim still looked as odd and green as the day Dib had met him, 'met' being a relatively calm term for what had happened. They had pretty much been the same for all those years, although Dib had noticed that Zim seemed to have grown some morals as well, probably from the hormones. Zim's disguise wasn't much better, although now he wore an actual backpack over his PAK and had a slightly more normal wig. It was raven black, as always, but had bangs and was longer. Sometimes it almost made him look like a girl, much to Dib's amusement. Zim had also begun wearing fingerless gloves since Gir had advised him to do so after watching too much MTV. Another thing about Irkens- they had no fingernails.

Zim turned a corner again, and Dib rushed off behind him. They flew down the street, knocking over many a pedestrian and sending a few shopping bags into the air. Both were panting heavily now- the chase had lasted a good hour already. If they hadn't been used to this sort of thing they probably would have collapsed a while ago. Maybe this time it would finally work out, reasoned Dib.

Zim suddenly came to the corner and turned abruptly, running across the street, asphalt crunching under his heavy Irken boots. Luckily for him there were no cars at the time. Dib soon skittered after him, rushing into the street with reckless abandon. Zim had already gotten to the other side safely, and had no intention of turning back. Until he heard the squeal.

Dib turned, mid-step, towards the giant machine coming towards him. Time slowed to cruel pace, letting Dib take in every refraction of light, every shadow, every inch of the thing closing in on him. His eyes widened, and for a moment he knew exactly what was going to happen. Fate had finally caught up to him.

Time resumed her normal speed.

There was a cry and a and a loud crack.

Zim saw the boy fly, tumbling back into the street. The car screeched to a halt. He landed with a sick splish, bouncing on the pavement, head snapping back before hitting the road again. Then he lay there, eerily still. There was a pause, then everything went into overdrive. People crowded around, making it impossible to see what was going on. Zim rushed to push through the crowd. There were too many people though, and he just kept getting sent back.

Suddenly a shout was heard. "Get back! Give him some room!" It came from a stranger, but the crowd obeyed and made a loose circle around the boy. Zim saw his opportunity and shoved through to the small center clearing.

As soon as he stepped in he heard a splash, and looked down. Ruby red blood stained his boots. He quickly found the source, laying in the middle of the road. No words escaped his mouth- only a name. "Dib?" he questioned, not quite believing what he was seeing.

"Oh my God, he's not breathing!" exclaimed a girl, who was kneeling at his side. She was the one who had shouted for space. A small commotion erupted.

"Dib?" repeated Zim. He sneered. "Get up, human. The chase isn't over."

"Someone give me their cell phone!" she yelled, trying to get the crowd to focus. Somebody handed her a small plastic square, which she swiftly began dialing.

"Dib, get up," ordered Zim, albeit shakily. He started towards the boy, each step sloshing lightly. Zim was beginning to quiver. Dib was not getting up. Dib was not fighting. Dib was not doing anything except laying there like her was dead. Zim swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry. Everything was so clear, the blood reflecting crystalline crimson in the glint of the sunlight, Dib sprawled on the gray, blue shirt staining as the seconds ticked by, seeming like hours.

Zim crouched down by his enemy. The girl on the phone glanced at him quizzically but soon was trying frantically to tell the 9-1-1 operator to get an ambulance. There was a silence, a few 'ok's, a few 'yes's, a few 'no's, and another silence. She looked at Zim, who was sitting with a lost stare on his face. "Do you know him?" she asked quickly. Zim jolted up, startled. He didn't seem to remember how to talk at the moment, so he just nodded. There was some more conversation, but Zim didn't seem to notice. He just gazed at his fallen enemy, trembling and shaken.

A flash of lights signaled that the ambulance had showed up. A path opened up, and a flood of paramedics rushed to the boys side. Zim was pushed out of the way, and stared, horrified as they lifted him onto a stretcher and hauled him inside, leaving a trail of blood in their wake. At the last second his brain seemed to kick in. "I know him!" he called, jumping up. A nurse motioned for him to hurry, and he leaped into the back of the white vehicle. He had to follow Dib. As soon as he was in, the nurse reached and pulled the back doors shut.

Zim could hear the sirens wailing through the ambulances thin metal walls. Paramedics swarmed around the battered body, attaching tubes and wires wherever they were needed. There was a buzz of excitement, and Zim only caught snippets of what they were saying. 'No response... crucial to... stop the bleed... check for... fractured his... internal...' were a few of the phrases he caught out of the heavy air, charged with fresh panic and smelling like a mix of bleach and blood. Zim just stood silently, pressed against the metallic white-wash walls, trying to take it in and block it out at the same time. He made sure he was out of their way.

So this was victory.

A bump jostled the ambulance, rattling all the tubes and wires. A repetitive blip over the soft hum of talking was the only thing indicating the body on the stretcher was still there. And even then, it might not have been really there. Zim almost fell over, but caught himself. A new drip of vermilion shone on the floor. Zim traced it up the pale hand it had come from, even paler arm where the usual trench had been discarded, and up his shoulder to his face.

That face. That face that had taunted Zim for so long now lay flat on a starchy cotton mat, eyes closed and mouth open in a silent scream that would never be heard. A dirty streak ran down his cheek, and ended with a dot of still wet crimson. Dib's glasses were gone, shattered on the side of the road, left where nobody would notice them. The whole scene hit something in Zim, something that wasn't supposed to be, but it nonetheless hit.

So this was victory, eh? No glorious battle, no fight to the finish. Zim had just unwittingly lured the boy into danger. He stared Dib in the face, trying to feel happiness instead of shock. He tried to give a proud victory grin, but all he could manage was a grimace.

Suddenly Dib was whisked out of Zim's sight in a whirlwind of panicking nurses and emergency tech's. They had arrived at the hospital. Zim leaned out of the van, hoping to see where he was going. He didn't want to loose sight of the boy. Before he could jump out and follow, however, one stray nurse tapped him on the shoulder.

"Do you know his name? We need to contact his family as soon as possible," she asked hurriedly.

Zim's mouth seemed to stick for minute, but then he quickly realized how urgent she sounded. "Yes, that's Dib. The... Membrane's boy," he said with a bit of difficulty. His brain wasn't really working at full steam; the image of Dib hooked up to all those wires, those bloody wires and tubes, rusty color soaking through him was still burnt into his mind.

The nurse seemed completely shocked. "M- Membrane? A- as in P- Professor Membrane?" she stuttered, wondering if she could have possible heard wrong. Zim nodded shakily, to her utter horror. "Oh God..." she muttered under her breath, before realizing that she still had a patient in critical condition. She leaped out, sprinting after the team, already heading to surgery. Zim didn't hesitate for a second. He ran up behind her, and into the emergency bay.

Everything was stark, horrible white. He kept following the woman, who had caught up to the team and was now shouting for everyone available to help out. "Four plus emergency!" she shouted, causing startled heads to pop out of doorways lining the halls they were running. "We need help, now!" she commanded. Zim followed closely, his usual fear of hospitals abandoned. There was no time for hesitation now. He had to follow. After all, as soon as Dib woke up the fight would start again.

They rushed past many doors but finally went into one. However, the nurse stopped Zim before he could enter. "I'm sorry, but you'll have to stay in the waiting room," she explained.

Zim began to protest, "But I-"

"Look, I know you're upset and you want to help," she said rushed, "but you just can't." A few doctors rushed in beside her. "I'm sorry," she added sympathetically. Then she turned and entered the room, leaving Zim alone in the hall.

He stepped down the hall to the crowded waiting room, filled with sniffles and old magazines. He found a chair and sat down, then pulled his knees up and buried his heavy head. He hated being powerless, but he knew the only thing he could do was wait and scheme. Dib would come bursting through the door soon. It was just a matter of time. This was definitely not victory. This was nothing worth celebrating.

"What did you do, you bastard?"

Gaz stared down her nose at him. Zim looked up, surprised that so much time could have passed already. The professor was standing by the door, demanding that the nurses let him in to the OR.

He swallowed, throat feeling thick and face looking pained. "Zim did nothing."

"Bullshit," she said as she sat down next to him. "There's no way that you let Dib hurt himself without your help."

Zim waved his hand in dismissal. "Silence, human. Zim did nothing. Dib was merely struck by a vehicle and knocked out. Had I been involved he would be a lot more defeated than he is now. Dib is just fine."

Gaz had changed over the years too. She still had the same purple hair as always, and it was still curled up in the same style as before. She had grown some, but was still a 'little girl', in most respects. Her black dress had been replaced with a baggy grey hoodie, though she still wore her skull charm. She usually wore a pair of blue jeans, but would sometimes a black skirt, much like her old dress. Today she had picked the jeans.

"This was not a victory. This was a minor accident. Dib will be out of here soon, and then we will resume our fight and I shall have a proper victory over him."

"He's just as incapacitated as he would be if you took him out," she replied, unable to stop herself from pointing out the flaw in his logic. Zim would never manage to take over the world anyway. It wasn't like helping him would do any good.

"Yes, but... this is not proper. I was supposed to defeat him by my superior skill as an invader!"

Gaz's eyebrows arched high on her forehead. "What do you mean, defeated?"

"Well," Zim corrected himself, "he hasn't been defeated. He's just... temporarily incapacitated. Dib would never die so easily." Gaz gave an involuntary twitch as Zim said 'die'. She was about to say something else when a man walked up to the pair, and both of them looked up. Professor Membrane towered above them, but soon took a seat next to Gaz, looking defeated.

"They say we can't see him yet," he said, voice sounding worn and ragged. He sat slumped in his seat, abandoning his usual refined posture. He stared at the tile between his two shiny black boots, barely visible under his lab coat. A sigh escaped him, and he looked back up. "You were there, weren't you, foreign boy?" Zim only nodded. Even though he and the professor had had a few talks, he still didn't know the alien's name. It didn't really bother Zim, though.

Membranes head drooped again, and he was once again staring at the floor. Gaz began to fiddle with her skull charm nervously. Waiting only made her more anxious. Zim only clutched his knees to his chest and stared at the clock, watching the seconds go by for what seemed like eternity.

The seconds went by like years, leaving the three to sit in agony. Membrane sat stiff in his chair, clearly frayed. The other two were faring no better. Zim couldn't stop himself from shaking; no matter how hard he tried to hold his knees to his chin he still trembled. Occasionally he could be heard mumbling to himself, "He'll come out here any minute now." Gaz bit her lip until it began to go numb. Still they waited.

Hours passed. Still they remained the same. People came and went, sat down and got up, and the three never moved. Nobody tried to talk to them- it was obvious they were all too upset, and nobody wanted to cause a breakdown in the waiting room. Every once and a while a choked sob would come from Membrane, followed by a thick swallow, but that was the only noise that the trio made.

Then, just when Zim felt like he was about to implode, a man in a white coat and large, wiry glasses walked up to them and asked, "Are you the family or friends Dib Membrane?" They all three looked up at the man. Zim's mind went blank. Dib should have already come out if he was... no, he had to be okay. Dib never died, no matter what. Zim knew, he had tried. He opened his mouth to ask what the man wanted, but Membrane spoke first. The man gulped.

"I... I'm sorry."

Zim felt time fall out from under him. The man would only be apologizing if he had failed to do something, and the only thing that needed doing was stitching up Dib, and if that could not be done then the boy was dead, but Dib couldn't be dead. It simply couldn't be.

"We did all we could," he continued, a sympathetic look on his face. Membrane didn't react. He didn't dare. Gaz covered her mouth, trying to remain expressionless. But Zim only shook his lowered head.

"No. No, that's impossible," he said shakily. He looked up, his face flushed. "No! You're lying! Dib is not dead!" he shrieked, leaping out of his seat and grabbing the mans collar. He was still quivering. Millions of thoughts swarmed in his mind, but above all a defying 'no' ran through his head. It couldn't be true. Zim refused to believe it.

But then the man paused, a confused look on his face. "I... never said he was."

Zim dropped him. He was shaking worse than ever. "But if..." he trailed off. Gaz lowered her hand from her mouth, and curled it into a fist. The man was once again lifted by his collar off the ground.

"You will tell me where he is or so help me I will shatter every single bone in your pathetic body and..." she growled, tears pricking at the corner of her vision. She began shaking as badly Zim had been, enraged at the useless idiot in front of her.

Membrane, breaking his stony silence, put his hand on her shoulder and said quietly, "Gaz." It was firm, though, and Gaz dropped him to the floor. This time he didn't land on his feet, however.

"R-r-room 215," he stammered, trying to adjust his glasses, now bent at an odd angle form the fall. He propped himself up on his elbows and continued, "It's down the hall and t-to the left." Zim was gone as soon as he heard the number, with Gaz not that far behind.

The Irken sprinted through the halls, pushing past nurses and knocking anyone stupid enough to get in his way down, leaving a trail of scattered papers being him. He was bounding through the halls, heart pounding in his ears. It synced up with his footsteps, hard on the tile, running for all they were worth. He would kill Dib for scaring him like that! He'd kill the stupid human who had the audacity to get hurt!

"Dib!" he yelled as he skidded to a stop. Silence replied.

Then he heard it. A electric beat, soft, barely audible through the excitement in his mind. He exhaled shakily, trying to clear his head. Yes, there was a steady rhythm in the room. And that meant...

"Dib! You stupid filthy worm, wake up! How dare you! You are not allowed to die unless Zim says so!"

Gaz burst in, and her face was hot with rage. She was panting from the sprint down the hall still, but it only took her a moment to realize what was in front of her. "You said he was okay!" She screamed, whirling to face Zim.

"Dib is fine," Zim said with a irritated scowl, "He is merely resting."

"He doesn't look fine!" she spat. Zim glared.

"Of course he is fine! This is the Dib human we're talking about. He must be fine, for he is useless to me if he is not alive to be my nemesis."

Before Gaz could spit out another comment, a solemn Professor Membrane and the same doctor from earlier came marching in. The Professor seemed very on edge, and when the doctor flipped on the lights all the way, everyone got to see how bad things really were.

Dib was wrapped all over in bandages. Some of them were already staining from the blood, but most were still cotton white. There were many tubes going into him- An IV drip with antibiotics, a tube for blood, as he had lost so much, and there was a tube in his throat, which connected to a humming machine; an oxygen machine. Dib's chest wasn't moving up and down like normal, but the beeping from his heart monitor told them that he was still alive.

"As you can see," explained the doctor, "we had to perform a tracheotomy to make sure his lungs got enough oxygen, and he had multiple fractures to his vertebrae. There was some internal bleeding, as well. All in all- he's in pretty bad shape."

"How bad?" demanded Zim. "Surely this is but a minor injury."

The doctor turned around. He had been speaking to the professor, but he supposed that question would have to be answered soon anyways. Besides, he didn't want to annoy these kids anymore- two death threats had been enough for one day. "We... we won't really know until he wakes up," he said. "We can do some tests now, but with his spinal cord injury, to move him would be unwise. So until he comes out of the coma, we'll ave to assume the worst."

"And that will happen... when?" asked Zim expectantly.

"We... don't know," he answered sheepishly. "It might only be few hours. It could be weeks, or even years," he continued, "It all depends."

Zim's eyes widened in shock. "Y- years?" he sputtered, horrified. The doctor only stared at the tile floor. "No, no, not acceptable," mumbled the alien. He stepped over to the bed. "Dib, wake up now. Zim commands you!"

He got no response.

"Dib, wake up! This is an order," he said, raising his voice.

Still nothing.

"Dib! Wake up, now!" he shouted.

And the boy just continued to lay there. Zim couldn't take it. He screamed at the top of his lungs, filling the room with an inhuman sound. He began to curse in Irken between demands for Dib's compliance. Eventually he wore himself out and fell to the floor. He punched at the dirty tile a few times before even that become too hard. It became quiet. For a moment Gaz thought Zim was laughing, but then she realized the real cause for his labored breathing.

"Should I get you guys chairs or something?" asked the doctor timidly. Membrane nodded again. The doctor raced off to get them what they needed. Zim stayed on the floor in a heap. This was not victory. This was only an accident. How dare Dib do this to he, the mighty Zim. Now the stupid human had left him without a nemesis to defeat. Without a reason to take over the world. Without a reason.

They sat there for hours ."I hate you," Zim managed to choke out every once and a while. "How dare you abandon Zim." The only other sounds came from the oxygen machine and the heart monitor. Zim practically crawled out of the room when visiting hours were over.


	2. Part 2

Zim was marching alone in a dimly lit street, asphalt sparkling in the rare spots where the streetlights hit it. Clouds covered the midnight blue of the night sky, and a rumble of thunder could be heard in the distance. His heavy black boots crunched on the pavement.

When he finally arrived at his base he plopped down on the couch and buried his head in his claws. "Taco time!" screamed Gir.

Zim's immediate reaction was to shout, "Gir, self destruct immediately!" Gir complied with glee, a ball of fire consuming him in a controlled explosion. There was a pause, then a sigh, and Zim ordered Minimoose to reassemble the robot. A happy squeak confirmed the request, and the purple blob floated out with Gir's shrapnel piled on his back.

Zim cursed himself for a moment, then went to the fridge. Cold human snack-food would satisfy his hunger. He took the entire tub of ice-cream with him to the couch, huddled under a blanket, and turned on the TV to see what the humans were up to now.

"-seems that Professor Membrane will delay his most recent projects to deal with the crisis. The Professor has called a press conference tomorrow, but as of now the boy's condition is unknown. Strange, isn't it Julie?"

"You said it, Mark. And now to weather with Rick Michealson."

"Thanks, Julie. Well, it looks like smooth sailing from here on out, as temperatures hover in the upper seventies. We will be seeing some scattered thunderstorms, but they'll pass over us without-"

Zim began flipping through channels in disgust.

"-ly my dear, I don't-"

"-will have his toughest chal-"

"-one of you will make it to the next-"

"-a big welcome to-"

"-just leave him there! You-"

Zim turned the infernal machine off and hurled the remote at the television. "Useless, just like the stupid species who built it," he fumed. He pulled his knees up to his chin and took large spoonfuls of sweetness into his mouth. He had to think.

If the human was in critical condition, too ill to fight then he must be made well again for Zim's amusement. He could not defeat the human if he was already defeated. He needed the human to be functioning for that.

He needed the human.

What talk! Especially coming from a victorious invader. But then, they had been over this before. Dib needed Zim to prove his sanity, and Zim needed Dib for a proper victory. No other enemy would do. Dib was the only one who challenged him. Who made an effort to stop his plans. Who payed attention to his schemes. He needed the Dib.

"You stupid smelly human," he murmured to himself, "How dare you abandon Zim."

His thoughts swirled in his mind for a bit before his body finally gave in to exhaustion. Restless sleep overtook him. He never slept particularly well, as his physiology was off for both human and Irken, but he had never awoken in panic before, cold sweat dripping down his antenna. This happened every couple hours until it was a knock on the door instead of a forgotten nightmare that woke him.

Gir opened the door first, now fully reassembled. He was covered in flour and wearing an apron. "Hi there, lady!" he cried.

"How many times do I have to tell you!" Zim gave a hoarse scream. "You do not let anyone into the base! You will-"

"Shut the hell up, Zim," Gaz barked as she entered. Her hair was slightly damp and her clothes fresh. Gir grinned stupidly at her. "Are you coming to the hospital or what?"

Zim was caught off guard. "What are you asking of Zim?"

Gaz grit her teeth. "Do you want to go to the hospital and wait to see if Dib wakes up today," she articulated slowly. Before Zim could give a proper reply, he was hit in the head with a muffin. Gir giggled.

"I made them myself!"

"Gir!" Zim yelled again, "Self destruct immediately!" The robot once again complied. Gaz was somewhat horrified, but kept her composure. "Why would Zim wish to waste his time in an icky germ-filled hospital? Dib is your kin, you wake him up."

Her hands curled into fists. "No one can just wake him up, Zim. If it was that easy they would have, moron. He could wake up at any time."

"He is not Zim's responsibility." The invader folded his hands across his chest.

"So then, you don't care whether he wakes up or not."

"Of course I care about Dib!" He shouted without thinking. Minimoose nudged him from behind with a sad squeak, and floated to his exploded companion. The alien looked from Gir's remains to Gaz, and then with a growl Zim said, "Fine, repair him again. I will be gone." He grudgingly cast a glance Gaz's way. He tried to glare, but his eyes did not obey.

As they stepped into the blinding sun, Zim's mind began to churn again. Everything seemed crystal clear. There was a light breeze, and many people were out, enjoying their Saturday. People smiling, laughing... it was all too confusing. He stepped into the taxi and slammed the door. Staring out the tinted windows brought him no comfort.

The world had kept going. They should have seen, these humans, just what they could have lost. But they continued as if nothing was amiss in their world. How could they not see- Zim without Dib to stand against him! Everything was wrong! Zim resigned himself to willing Dib to be awake when they arrived.

Gaz, on the other hand, resigned herself to thinking of all the ways she could kill Zim when Dib was well enough to enjoy it. The driver tried to shoot the breeze once before giving up.

"Funny, I heard it would be raining hard today," he chuckled.

"Irony," Zim bitterly mused. Gaz gave a growl. The rest of the ride was silent.

As they stepped down a hallway, leaving the quiet buzz of talking from the waiting room quickly behind, Gaz noticed the rumpled piece of paper Zim was grasping between his claws. It was colorful, with bright, thick marks, apparently made out to look like a smiley face, though it was hardly evident through the creases. "What's that?"

Zim looked down, forgetting for a moment what he was carrying. He opened up the palm of his hand to reveal a piece of paper folded down the middle, with scribbles all over the front. "Gir and Minimoose made it. They thought he could use a little cheering up."

Gaz nodded slowly, and they soon found themselves in front of room 215, written in bold white letters, matching the stark ivory of every other surface in that horrible place. Zim went in first, the girl solemnly following after him. As the door shut they both gulped, choking down the horrible wave of nausea that hit when they saw him again. It wasn't as bad as yesterday, though- the initial shock had somewhat passed, and Dib looked a little better than before. It looked like his bandages had been changed, and the clean gauze brought a bit of comfort. One of the tubes had also been taken out- he didn't need any more blood transfusions, for now.

Zim flicked the dimmer off on the overhead lights and stepped further in. Membrane's chair was still sitting by the corner. He tip-toed over to the front of the bed, fingers brushing up against the edges of the plastic medical-blue mattress. "Dib?" he tried.

No response.

"Hello, human," he whispered, brushing a strand of raven hair out of his expressionless closed eyes. Pink blood vessels showed through the pale skin of his eyelids. It was soft to the touch- they had washed him up. It had been matted with asphalt and blood when he had come in, now it was silky and clean against the white cotton pillow. Zim sighed and turned to Gaz.

"Want the chair?" he asked. She nodded with her usual glare and sat down, but not before moving it in a bit closer to her big brother. Zim sat on the floor again, this time leaning against the side of the chair and staring at the wall, listening the subtle pulse coming from the cardiogram. Membrane came marching in about an hour late.

"Gaz? Come with me, I think we should have a family outing," he ordered. Both of them looked up, startled. He sounded very ruffled, but that was to expected. "I hope you don't mind staying here, foreign boy."

Gaz almost began to protest, but Membrane soon had a hold on her hand and was dragging her away. "What the hell are you-"

"They'll call us if something happens, now lets go," he commanded, as the door slammed on its own behind them.

Zim blinked. That was certainly... odd. Now he was alone, though, and that made him a bit uneasy. Hospitals usually had morgues in them, and morgues had autopsy tables. He shuddered. Still, there was no one to disect him now. A regretful glance was given to the boy in front of him. He got up and sat back down in the chair, scooting it up even closer, so he could touch the boy if he wanted to. He started comforting himself by caressing the downy black hair in front of him. It was nothing like his thick, wiry wig. He grimaced. Another thing that Dib was beating him at. For now.

Then he moved down to the boy's gently curved hand. It wasn't wrapped in bandages, a small miracle. He interlocked his hand with Dib's as best he could, considering the difference in fingers. It was limp, but Zim could still feel it radiating heat. It was a sign that the boy was alive. He would take anything he could get.

Suddenly Zim looked up. He could have sworn he heard the cardiogram speed up a bit. He inspected it, but before he could really get a good look, it was replaced with the new. He paused a moment before decided it was just his imagination. He turned and faced the boy again, still keeping hold of his delicate hand. Resting his elbow on the armrest, he cupped his chin in his other hand, staring at the familiar figure before him. He halfheartedly cursed him every few minutes for being this way.

"You... are not supposed to be here," he told the boy. "You have never given up so easily before. You are Zim's enemy. You are not supposed to be weak. You've had all of Zim's might set against you and never faltered. How could you do this now?

"Now, when I need to destroy you more than ever. If you're not there to destroy then there's no point. I've saved the planet before, just to have the chance to defeat you. You are not allowed to take that away from me!"

Zim caught himself shouting and stopped to breathe for a few minutes.

"...If I don't defeat you there's no point. Earth would be too easy to take over and give to the Tallest, if they would e- no. No, you see, this is why you must wake up. All these things I've done just to keep up with you. They've changed me.

"And it's all your fault, human. So... wake up. Zim demands that you wake up."

Dib's eyelids fluttered.

For once Zim was shocked that he was listened to. He choked on something to say, eventually sputtering out, "D-D-Dib? Can- can you hear me?" The heart monitor began to speed up. Zim felt like screaming, but couldn't think of anything to shout.

Dib didn't move, except for the flutter of his eyelashes. It could have been nothing but a spark gone wrong in the boy's brain. Zim didn't care. He suddenly realized what to scream. "Wake up! Dib! Wake up! Damn you, wake up!! Don't you dare...!" A nurse rushed in, getting between Zim and the human.

"Sir, calm down, step away from him, keep your voice down. Sir, please, or I'll call the-"

"He's almost awake, look at him! Dib! Wake up-"

"You shouldn't be in here in the first place, if family is not present then-"

"I'll never forgive you if you don't **wake up now!**"

"Security!"

As Zim was dragged away, kicking and cursing in Irken, he glimpsed Dib's body. He was still as stone, as always. Pale and still. Like a corpse. Zim screamed, then went limp.

Stumbling out of the hospital and into the day nearly blinded him. Zim hesitated at the entrance, then decided to walk. Going forward without stopping or caring to figure out where he was sounded like the best escape possible for the alien. After an hour, he found an empty cafe. He sat there as the sky turned overcast and the air became humid. Being pestered by one of the women behind the counter forced him to order something. He threw it out after one bite, then left.

When he finally got back to his base the TV was on and the lights were dimmed so that the night seemed to carry inside. Zim took about two steps, shut the door behind him, and collapsed face down on the floor, physically and emotionally exhausted.

"Master?" inquired Gir, peeking his head out from inside the kitchen. Minimoose floated above him, giving a curious squeak. Zim didn't even bother to look up.

A familiar voice growled. "Zim."

"Gaz?" Zim turned slightly to glance at her. Her mascara had begun to streak and her hair was frizzing.

"What happened to you?" they asked in unison. They both glared in response, but then Zim decided to ask the obvious question.

"What are you doing here?"

"Shut up. I'm sleeping on your couch tonight. Don't try anything smart, and don't wake me up."

Zim grit his teeth and stood. "I'll be below," he said curtly.

"Whatever." She kicked her feet up on the couch and clicked through the channels. Gir hobbled up on the armrest and stared at the screen. Minimoose rested on Gir's head. Zim stepped into the elevator and ordered it to his personal chamber.

It only took an hour for him to wake the first time. Gaz was staring at him with her fist raised. "I can hear you screaming from upstairs. Keep it down or I'll make you wish you were stuck in that nightmare."

Zim tried to stop his heartbeat from pounding in his ears. "Zim can not help it," he panted, "Zim cannot help... this."

She paused a moment to let him catch his breath. "You really like him, don't you?"

"That's ridiculous," he muttered. "He's a human and I'm Irken, and we're both male. Besides, we're supposed to be enemies. That's just-"

"I didn't ask for the reasons why you can't. I asked if you do," she snapped.

Zim snarled in disgust and turned away from her. "Goodnight, Gaz." She gave him one more good punch in the back of the head before she went upstairs again. Zim slept very little the rest of the night.

Morning was hell, too. Gir had already begun to make waffles when he got topside, and Gaz was sitting in his kitchen eating as if she owned the place. But at this point Zim could barely bring himself to care. He plopped himself down at the table and picked at his food.

"Dad talked to some of the other doctors," Gaz said between bites of waffle. Zim yawned and looked up. "He wanted to know their opinion on Dib's condition. And you know what they said?" Her mouth twitched. "They said that people in his condition rarely recover. They said that Dib should die peacefully. They said to give up."

Zim's mouth hung open, then snapped shut with an audible click. There was a crash, and Zim stood shaking with fury. His dishes were broken and scattered on the floor, with remnants of breakfast still clinging to the smooth floor.

"They want to give up? Give up on Dib? They want to give up on the one person who never gave up on them?! The one person who would believe in them, even when they cast him out and rejected them?! Foolish, pitiful-" For a moment Zim degenerated into growls and grunts of fury. "It's as though they want to be destroyed! Don't they know that he is the only one who dares stand against Zim?!"

"Shut up."

Zim sat down, his fist shaking. Minimoose squeaked nervously. "This is unacceptable. Completely unacceptable."

"He asked me if I thought they were right." Gaz ate another mouthful of waffles. "I told him where to go."

Zim continued to talk to himself. "They can't give up on him. Dib is still there. Dib is still alive."

"I had to get away from that stupidity."

"I saw him."

"Are you even listening to me?" Gaz slammed her fist on the table. Zim didn't bat an eye.

"I saw him. I know he could see me too. I saw his eyes move. He's alive, so close to waking! How can they not see?"

"What are you talking about?" Gaz narrowed her eyes.

"He moved when you were gone. He blinked. I saw him."

Gaz's face screwed up in loathing. "They didn't tell us anything. You must have imagined it."

"They kicked me out," Zim said.

Gaz grunted. "Whatever. This is almost as stupid as home. I'm going to the hospital."

"Zim is going too."

"Will they even let you in? If you got kicked out?"

"If you're there."

Gaz clicked her tongue. "Ugh. Fine. Just shut up."

It didn't take long for them to get there. There were a few wispy clouds in the sky, but otherwise it was bright and sunny. Zim once again wondered on how the world could spin without what was so important to it.

They were soon at the hospital. There wasn't much traffic to hold them up, because most people were at church during the early sunday morning. People in the waiting room were sparse, and there was only one secretary at the front desk. She was flipping through papers, looking very bored and smacking her gum loudly. Zim snapped his fingers, trying to get her attention. She looked up and raised an eyeborw.

"You the kid here for your radiation treatment?" she asked.

Zim scowled. "Uh, no."

"We're here to visit. Dib?" Gaz inquired.

"Dib? The Membrane kid? Um..." she raised an eyebrow skeptically.

Zim's spooch jumping into his throat. "What?"

"He's... uh..." she trailed off, scratching the back of her head. She turned to the wall, though you could tell she wasn't looking at anything.

"What?" he repeated, growing more alarmed.

"Um... well, his dad just... uh..." she mumbled.

"Spit it out!" exclaimed Gaz.

"Uh, look, I'm sorry, but..." she trailed off. Both eyes went wide. Then, after a split second, they both took off, sprinting through the double doors and down the hall. "Wait!" she called after them, leaning over the desk.

Down the hall, the two of them skidded to a stop and flung open the door. Half a dozen pairs of shocked eyes met them.

"What are you doing?!" screamed Gaz. Zim wanted to throw up. The professor was gripping his oxygen tube as if to tear it out. Membrane looked angrily at Gaz.

"I told that nurse to keep you kids out for a reason," he explained, "I know you're upset, but you have to understand, there's no-"

"What are you talking about? You're just going to give up on him? How can you even pretend to care about him?"

"Please, daughter, I'm only doing what's best for everyo-"

"Shut up!"

Zim joined in. "How dare you attempt to harm the Dib. How dare you give up on him. I need him to live!"

Membrane turned to the alien. "Be rational, foreign boy. How can-"

"There is no logic if Dib is not here! If he is not there to be my opposite, then I cannot do what needs to be done!"

"You should not be in this room anyway, foreign boy. Could someone escort him out?"

Zim cried out in frustration and rushed at the group of doctors. They all scattered, letting Zim run into Dib's hospital bed. He choked as it hit him square in the stomach. He hesitated, then whipped around. "Don't you touch him! Don't you dare let him die!"

"Zim, I'm his legal guardian, I-"

"No!" he screeched again, distress evident in his cracking voice. He spread his arms wide in front of Dib's hospital bed. The cardiograph speeding up teased his antennae, but he didn't dare look back. "I'll kill you if you come closer," he hissed. "You stay back."

Someone shouted "Security!" and Zim's shoulders slumped. He stole one look behind him before a security guard began to take him away. Dib's face looked flushed, for once. Zim's eyes stung, and he let his head droop down to hide from the painful light. He tried to pull away and was shocked for his efforts.

The shock ran through his PAK and for a moment his world went dark, silent, and formless. When he woke up again he was being dragged down the hall. He heard something without understanding it, and eventually recognized it as Gaz. Then he heard another voice. Deeper. Membrane.

Something jolted him. He realized he had stopped in the middle of the hall.

"Fine, if you wish to fight for a lost cause then do it. I have science to work on! I can't wait for your brother to get better. You! Security! Hold on a minute."

"He's dangerous, sir. We can't let him threaten security of the hospital."

"Yes, fine, but let my daughter in when she wants. I'm reconsidering my previous position. My son will continue his stay, for the time being."

Zim, still limp, smiled his zipper-tooth smile. Dib would have a chance, for now. As the hospital staff sent him out the front door for the second time in as many days, he began to plan. It was clear that he would get no help with this. He would have to rebuild Dib's broken body, wake him from his coma, and save Dib himself. So that he could destroy him. All he had to do was find a cure.

Waiting for Dib to wake on his own was a pain. This, Zim could do.


	3. Insomnia

Zim once again fell asleep to the beat of Dib's heart. Gaz decided to forego sleep that night, knowing she probably wouldn't be able to anyways. Her mind was still buzzing with the previous days events. 

It was a while past sunrise when Zim finally sat up and groggily rubbed his eyes. He looked around, dazed, until he found Gaz still staring at the moniter. Light was spilling into the hospital room, and golden slits were begining to shine thought the blinds and illuminating stripes against medical instruments in the background. A bit made it's way to Dib's head and onto his face, making his cheeks shine golden, contrasting the sullen grey of the rest of him.

Zim stepped up behind her silently and lay his hand on her shoulder. "How long have you been looking?" he asked, trying to stay quiet; trying not to break the peace of dawn, or startle Gaz.

She didn't answer for a moment, and Zim almost thought she didn't hear him. Then she spoke up, "I think the whole time."

"Well, maybe you should get going," he encouraged softly, explaining unenthusiastically, 'It's Monday."

"So?" she inquired. It was obvious she still wasn't completely there. She was there, Zim could feel her presense, but it was as if she was in another place, a dream maybe. It didn't look like a happy dream, though, it was a glum, foggy dream. Zim looked to the window- the weather matched her attitude. Mist covered everything, and it was colder than the day before. The sky was grey where the sunrise didn't touch- where it did there was a brilliant red patch, with a gold glow circling it.

"We have skool," he answered, chest filling with dread.

Gaz blinked and paused, then shook her head sadly. "It's not right..." she sighed. With a tired grunt she stood up, Zim's hand falling back to his side in the process. "Thanks for letting me stay," she mumbled. "I had better get ready at my house."

"No problem," he replied quietly. A tiny wave and a 'click' of a door later, and Zim was once again left with no shoulder to lean on. He shuffled back to his room, staring down at the floor. Skool sounded like hell right now, but Zim figured it would be the best thing for himself to do. Besides, if Gaz could get through it, so could he.

He went to his dresser and pulled out a new set of clothes- a blue hoodie that almost reminded him of Dib's old shirt, another pair of black pants, and his same old choker and sneaker combination. His new wig was placed back on his head and brushed as he stared sadly back into his reflection in the mirror. Something struck him, and he put the brush down beside him on the bed and walked towards the mirror. He brushed some hair from in front of his now-violet eyes, and realized something.

Dib had been right, he kinda did look like a girl.

_Sob._

_Thunk._

_"Master?"_


	4. For the sake of the Mission

Gir was once again tugging on the Irken's sleeves, trying to get his attention and ask him why he had fallen to the floor, crying. Zim quickly waved him away, trying to swallow his sobs, and the robot waited patiently for him to sufficiently calm down. 

"Why you keep getting so sad?" the andriod asked innocently, with his usual childrish grammar.

Zim sniffled, "Its just- its just that something reminded me of him. Of Dib."

"Well why you so sad?" he inquired.

"Because," he tried to explain, "Dib is hurt very badly right now, and- he just- I dont know what to do. It's been very hard on me not knowing whats going to happen to him."

"You still gonna go to skool?"

Zim replied a swift, "Yes, I suppose," adding, "I'll have to press on for the sake of the mission." The last word was said as if it were foreign to him, like a strange taste in his mouth. In truth, he hadn't thought about his mission at all since Friday; since he and Dib had been whisked away in the ambulance. And really, it didn't seem very important now. He was too busy worrying about the boy to worry about Earth- and it's not like he would have been able to bring himself to do anything anyway. Even Zim wouldn't stoop that low- attacking while Dib was slipping in and out of a coma was unthinkable.

"Yes, I'm probably late already," he mumbled distractedly. He grabbed his backapck and pulled it over his PAK, and waved a quick goodbye to Gir as he shuffled out the door, many keychains jingling behind him as he stepped- another attempt at normalcy. He knew he proabably looked like hell- Gaz didn't need to point it out any more- and he didn't really care. At least he mould match how he felt on the inside.

He pulled his hood over his head, crossed his arms, and shivered. The cold fog made for a wet, cold, and dull walk to school. Clenching his jaw to try to keep his teeth from chattering only made him sore, so he eventually gave up and moved his hands over his face, so his warm breath would hit them and bounce back to warm the pale green cheeks back to their normal color. The moist air made his skin tingle, but it was bearable.

Once he did get to skool, and was safely inside, he took his hood down and moved without a word to homeroom. He only muttered a quick 'hi' to Gaz as he passed her locker in the hall. The other students glanced between Dib's empty desk and the unusually quiet Zim, obviously thinking that there wa some connection between the two. Homeroom almost seemed awkwardly silent without the two semi-insane people screaming at each other and horsing around. The bell soon rang for First period, and Zim unsurprisingly got passed a note inquiring about Dib's whereabouts. Zim took one look at it and placed his head down on the desk, burying it in his arms. This set off a small chain reaction.

_Whisper._

_Mumble._

_'Psst.'_


	5. Im Sorry

"Hey Zim," inquired the student behind him, leaning in with a good number of the people surrounding him listening, "do you know where Dib is today?" 

Without looking up he answered flawlessly, "Yes, but I don't think it's any concern of yours."

"Ooh, what happened, Zim? Tell us!" piped up the girl behind him to the right. The others nodded him encouragement.

"Well," the alien sighed, "if you really must know... he's in the hospital." A shiver ran up his spine as he said it, and he felt like crying some more, but tried to choke it down.

A surprised gasp rose from the crowd, causing everyone but the teacher to look over and several whispers to ripple through. "Why?" another girl chirped, "What happened?"

"He-" Zim's voice cracked a bit, "He was hit by a car." He felt compelled to add, "And they don't know whats wrong with him yet."

There was a pause, then a spree of wild speculation broke out amongst them. Zim felt his stomach curdle as gleeful shouts of 'maybe he'll die!' 'maybe hes got braindamage!' 'maybe hes paralyzed!' 'maybe he has amnesia!' 'maybe he'll never have to come back!' erupted and cheers sounded from all the class. "Great job, Zim! We always knew you'd get the better of him!" a classmate shouted to the speechless Zim, giving him a congradulatory smack on the shoulder.

Zim felt himself go numb. His chest hollowed out, his ears went deaf, his eyes unfocused and after his heart skipped a beat he burst into tears.

The students stopped and turned. Most were shaking hands, patting each other on the back and giving each other high fives. "What's wrong, Zim?" asked the boy who had first thrown him the note, giving him a curious look.

Zim drew a ragged breath and sat up. "What's wrong?" he echoed fiercly, tensing up. "What's wrong?" he hissed, whipping around to show them the tears streaking down his face. "Someone almost died and you're celebrating!" he shouted, face contorted with rage.

"But, c'mon Zim, it was only Dib," he said, making a funny face on the last word and modifying his voice to sound like a very stupid Dib impression. The students around him chuckled.

"Only Dib? Only Dib?!" he screeched. "That boy has saved your sorry asses more times than I can count and all I have ever seen him get back for it is a bunch of crap! Hes done more for me than any of you will ever know- he's making me rethink my whole exsistance! And if you pathetic wastes of DNA can't appreciate all he's ever done for this stupid ball of dirt than you can just shut your mouths, because he is a better person than YOU could ever be!!!" he screamed, standing up in his chair and facing them completely. His face was twisted in fury, he was shaking from the anger stiffening his muscles and hot tears were once again trailing down his face. Everyone stared at him, shocked. A charged silence filled the room.

"But," a girl, the first to regain her voice, said quietly, "You've wanted to kill him ever since you've known him." Everyone shared her puzzled look. The comment caught him off guard. Very off guard.

"I- " Zim sputtered, energy draining from him and face going pale. "I- I- " he could only repeat that one syllable as tears dripped down his face, falling to the floor with an audible 'drip'. He took one step back automatically. Every piece of him was begging for him to run, to get away, to save face and not let them see him cry, and he could do nothing but listen. He rushed out the door and down the hall, and into the secluded sanctuary of a bathroom stall. He buried his face in his hands, but found that once he was alone, the tears wouldn't come. His throat was dry, making his sobs seem more like coughing.

"I- I- " he tried to find the words he had been searching for, parched lips mouthing the same syllable between sobs.

_"I- "_

_Gasp._

_"I'm sorry."_


	6. Regret

Zim tried to fight the internally tugging at his chest, a feeling he was unaccostomed too. He looked up and tried to steady his breathing. He managed to calm himself enough so that he could think somewhat rationally. He stood and opened the stall door, looking out into the empty room. His steps echoed out on the tile as he walked to the door, opening it an peeking out at the barren hallway. He took a tentative step out and stood there for a moment, trying to decide what to do. And all of this with that strange feeling eating at his squeedily spooch. 

Then the bell rang and he pulled himself back in to avoid the flood of kids rushing to lunch. He stood stiff, back to the door, waiting for the crowds to pass. It eventually quieted, and he stood, back to the door, until he couldnt hear anything outside the door at all. He turned, but as he was about to open it he heard faint footsteps. He moved back to his position, stiff and alert. They came closer and closer until they stopped at the door, and he felt the light knocks behind him. Green skin went crawling in panic, and he tried to stay as quiet as possible.

Then a familiar voice called out softly, "Zim?" He hesitated for a moment, then exhaled and let his body relax, leaning heavily against the door. "Zim, I know you're in there," said Gaz, trying to coax him out. He oblidged.

"How did you know?" he asked, peeking his head out the door and letting the rest of him follow.

"It's only all over the entire school, Zim," she said, with a gentle sarcasm. He sighed reservedly. "Zim," she inquired, "Did you mean it?"

"Mean what?" he asked automatically, feeling to drained to try and think of what he said. Everything seemed to be a blur now.

"What you said about Dib," she responded quietly.

"...Yes," he replied, barely audible. Gaz sighed and looked down, trying to gather her thoughts, then looked Zim in the eyes.

"You love him, don't you?"

Zim didn't bother to answer, he simply stared at his shoes. "...Gaz?" he eventually spoke up. "What- what is this feeling in my chest? It's like I've been doing something wrong, like I should have done something else, like I want to go back and change things, like..." he glanced up, looking for Gaz to supply him with the right words.

"It's called regret, Zim," she said sadly.

"But... Irkens arent supposed to feel such things," he mumbled, feeling a bit apprehensive.

"Well, you don't seem so Irken anymore. And... I think it's a good thing," she told him.

"Well-" he fiddled with his fingers nervously, "well- I guess... I..." he trailed off, not knowing what he was trying to retort to or with.

"Zim, you should go home," she encouraged him, pushing his chin up so he would stop staring at the floor. Seeing Zim like that was unnerving. It was just so... not Zim. This thing had really messed him up.

"I don't think I could bear it," he replied. "I think I might just go and... get lunch somewhere or something. I need a break," he sighed.

"Alright," she said, "I'm going to the cafeteria. Just-" she smiled lightly "-keep your antenna high, okay?"

"Okay," he nodded. He walked off with a sigh, not marching in his usual Zim-like manner, she noticed. She crossed her arms over her chest and tried to warm them by rubbing her hands up and down. She watched him walk off to heavens knows where and sighed. She just hoped everything would be alright.

_Step._

_Creak._

_Slam._


	7. Coffee Shop

He stood outside the Skool's front doors for a moment, letting the cold sink in. The wet spring air slapped him in the face as a breeze brought the fog over to him. He shivered and rubbed his hands together, but it did him no good. Everything was slick and freezing, and he noticed as he started walking. It seemed so different from the day before, when it felt like it was almost summer. 'Funny how fast things can change,' Zim pondered. His sneakers stepped off the sidewalk for a few moments because of his distraction, making squishing noises above the moist ground. He righted himself before he could realize how heartbreakingly true his thoughts were. He soon found himself walking down a city street, although there was hardly any traffic or people to show that the town was alive. 

And personally, Zim prefered it that way. He found an unassuming coffee shop and entered, but only because it was completely empty, save for staff. He ordered quickly and sat down with a curt 'thank-you'. The two clerks seemed a bit put-off, but quickly went back to their own conversation without a thought. Zim stirred his drink absentmindedly, not really listening to them nor thinking about anything. He had aquired a taste for coffee not long after he had developed partial immunity to water. When it had rained one day and Dib had pushed him out into the downpour and nothing happened, despite the paste factory's worker strikes causing a huge shortage, Zim realized that his stolen hormones were doing more than making him grow. He had tried to deny it to himself at first, which was easy, considering how often he did it, but had grudgingly accepted the fact after a while.

"So did you hear that Membrane's kid got hit by a car?"

Zim was snapped out of his trance by one of the clerks behind the counter, which he couldn't see because he was staring the oppostie way. Lucky, really, because he probably would have glared a hole in her head if he was looking at her.

"Yeah, I can't believe it. What do you think Membrane will do? Heard he's in a coma," said the other clerk.

"Oh man, he's probably all in a tizzy because of the bad PR," the first joked.

Zim stiffened. These two were talking about it as if it were some joke or some story, to be laughed at. He nearly crushed the cup in his hands, but let it sit on the table so he could clench his fists.

"Ha, Membrane!" she chuckled. "Can you imagine?"

"You know," Zim cut in harshly, "some people might be offened by your light analysis." His fists were tight on the table, and he was nearly shaking with rage.

The two looked up. "Oh, sorry, I just figured that 'big Membrane'-" she used a goofy voice for his title, "-would be the last to loose a kid to that sort of thing."

"I heard his kid is into the paranormal. Weird, huh?" the other asked.

Zim scoffed harshly. "So this is all a big joke, then? I'm freaking sick of it, everyone thinks this is some big news event. That boy could have died and he's still everybody's joke. Huh!" He crossed his arms and turned quickly to glower at the two. One was a red-head in a ponytail, and the other had short blond hair. Both wore nametags- the blond's saying 'Tiff' and the redheads saying 'Carol'.

"...Sorry," apologized Carol, looking at him with slight concern. "I actually feel for the kid. I mean, it cant be easy having a dad like that."

"No shit," Zim mumbled.

"Yeah, but you seem to really care about him," noted Tiff, speaking more to Zim than her fellow clerk. Zim didn't reply, once again, and instead reached under his wig to stroke the thin baby-hairs on his scalp. Those were another product of the hormones. That was what finalized it for Zim- seeing those. At first he complained about having the useless things to Gir, but soon adjusted. And actually, petting them seemed to calm him down almost as much a stroking his antenna. Someone doing that would seem to be more romantic though. They were very sensitive, much like the human lips.

"...I guess," he muttered.

_Sigh._

_Swirl._

_Splish._


	8. Napkins

"Dammit," grumbled Zim, looking down and the new coffee stains on his cloths. A wisp of steam accompanied a hiss, and he winced as the coffee buned his skin. "Ugh, dammit, still stings like a bitch... Don't you have any napkins?!" He called back angrily to the two girls. 

Carol was almost taken aback for a moment. "What? Oh, oh!" she realized what he meant and grabbed and handful of them, rushing to his side. "Sorry, sir, here, let me-" She was quickly shoved away.

"Zim," he snapped, wiping up the spill and trying to soak as much of it up as possible without agitating his minor burns. It wasnt as bad as it used to be- before he would have been screaming and rolling on the floor trying to get it off, but it was really more of a sting than an 'oh-my-gawd-I've-been-dipped-in-liquid-fire' type of pain.

"Excuse me?' she asked, confused. She brushed a strand of hair out of her face as she said it.

"My name is Zim," he growled, "not sir." He continued dabbing thte napkins on the stain, but seemed slightly less agitated.

"Oh," she said neutrally. "I'm Carol, sorry about that. Would you like another coffee or...?"

"I can read your tags," he told her grouchily. "And no, I still have half the cup left." As if to demenstrate he lifted it with his free hand, blew on the top and took another sip. It burned, but with a pleasent sort of burn, a sticky bittersweet taste mixing with the coffee. Zim licked his lips with a few smacking noises and set the cup down.

"So, uh..." began Tiff, still behind the counter.

"Yeah, uh, you seem know a lot about Membrane's boy," said Carol, trying to start up conversation again, and hopefully settle her curiosity, which was stirred up worse than the bottom of a murky lake.

Zim scowled. "His- -name- -is- -Dib." He siad it slowly, deliberately, with emphasis on each syllable. "At least give him the respect to call him by his own name."

"The professor doesnt talk about him much, how are we supposed to know?" defended Tiff. Zim only sighed at this, leaving an awkward pause. "Uh, so you-"

"Yes," he said loudly, with much aggitation in his voice, "I know him, I have known him for years, now if you will please stop questioning me about it so I could get back to my coffee!" The two girls flinched.

"Uh, well," Carol mumbled, "If you would tell us we wouldnt be so curious and then we would know a little more about it and..." she looked up to see Zim glaring at her. "...and then we would know more about him, since hes so important to you..."

_Tap._

_Tap._

_Sigh._


	9. Newfound Confidants

This seemed to break Zims angry resolve. "...fine," he murmured, trying to sound begrudging but only making tired. He stirred his coffee a bit, took a sip, and then as the eager girls looked on, began to re-tell almost everything that had happened in the past few days. He conviently left out the kiss, and the fact that he was an alien, although something told him it wouldnt have bothered them too much. They seemed like nice girls, although they were a bit rough around the edges. It was about half an hour later when he finally stopped. He was wiping away a few stray tears, and they looked pretty close to it themselves. 

"Wow, I... I had no idea..." whispered Tiff, though to who it was not quite clear.

"Poor thing... You and him both," Carol said, looking at Zim. He felt himself get squished between the two warm humans, although he didnt react and hug back. "From now on you come and talk to us when you feel like you're gonna explode, okay?" she asked.

"Alright," mumbled Zim, feeling rather pathetic being hugged by the two humans.

"So... what are you going to do after this?" inquired Tiff. "Cause I mean, you cant really go back to school..."

Zims face contracted. "I dunno..." he mumbled, "I can always go see Dib... he might wake up again..." He seemd to lose himself in thought, and the girls look at each other with concern. Then Zim's exression changed from thoughtful to confused, but he stayed silent for a while longer. It had been almost a minute before he looked up from the stained and scratched up table, to the scuff marks on the hard wood floor beneath him, and to the faces of the two. "Just a question..." he mumbled. "...why... why do you care?"

The two seemed to be shocked at this question. "Well... um," Carol tried futily to answer.

"Where I come from if someone has a problem they keep it to themselves, they figure it out on their own... nobody goes for help. Its a sign of weakness..."

The girls were stunned. "Well..." began Tiff, fiddling nervously with her fingers, "How can I explain? Here... people try to care about other people. You can't just keep your problems to yourself, you need someone to talk to... you need someone."

"But, where I come from," He knew better than to say where he came from, "you're not supposed to need anything."

"Well, but... everyone needs someone," pointed out Carol.

This sent Zim back into his pensive pose. He leaned back in the chair again to stare at the vapors still rising, nearly transparent above his styrofoam cup. One hand went up to his chin, to support it, and the other went to the table.

_Tappity._

_Tappity._

_Tap._


	10. Faint

Zims thoughts swirled around his head as his thoughtful tapping slowed and ceased. The girls looked at him, concerned, and Tiff gingerly placed a hand on his shoulder. He didnt hear her ask if he was okay. He only heard himself. 

_'Everyone needs someone? What does that mean? On Irk nobody needs anyone, that is the way things are, but... is that how they really are? The Tallest have each other... who do I have? Dib? He was always there, even though... no! I am an invader, I need no one! But even invaders have someone, they have their SIR's. So then me and GIR need each other, but... something is still missing._ '

"Zim?" she asked again.

_'Who does that boy have? His sister was not nearly herself, and they've never been close. He doesnt have friends or a family, so all thats left is... his enemy? Am I all he has? It certainly feels like it. What am I to him then? Nothing more than a faceless alien scum, or... could I be more to him?_'

"Zim?" Her voice sounded slightly more alarmed.

'_More importantly, what is he to me? I say I am an invader, but I havent thought about my mission hardly at all. I dont even know if I could go on with my mission. My leaders are less than perfect; our system is flawed. I suppose I owe those discoveries to him too, then. So what is he to me? If we were really just enemies, wouldn't I have been celebrating? I suppose things have never gotten this serious before- has this all been a game? It feels like I was merely procrastinating, just waiting, because I could never have... is it right that I feel this way? Did I always?_'

"Zim!" she was trying to snap him out of his trance, but he seemed to have frozen.

'_No! I am an Irken! I am an invader! I am better, I am... what am I? Look at me, I'm hardly Irken anymore. I know I'm not better, if that were true this planet would belong to me by now... he only has earthly resources, I have the entire galaxy at my fingertips. But If I am not Irken, if I am not an invader, what am I- who am I? Why does this not make sense? Whats happening to me?_'

Zim felt himself getting lighter, and his arms and legs locking in place. Black began to twirl at the edges of his vision, and he went limp. His head floped back and he made a pained noise. Green lids closed over the pitch black nothing he was seeing as he fell to the ground with a shiver, and consciousness left him. Both girls gasped, but they would not have to worry for long.

_'Re-activating'_

_Groan._

_"My head..."_


	11. And I think

A/N: Wow, 100 reviews! I'm really shocked and flattered, thanks everyone! Especially those repeat reviewers, and you know I love youuu. Everyone who's given me feedback, thank you, and everyone who reads, thank you. Now I wont drag out the authors note too long here, but I really appreciate it, and I want you to think of this as my little gift to you.

* * *

"Zim?" asked Tiff, crouching down and looking concerned. Zim was propped up on his elbows and holding his head.

"Yes yes, I'm fine," he answered, almost curtly, swatting her away. Almost taken aback, she moved away and stood up, not taking her eyes off him. He quickly tried to get back up on his feet using the help of a chair.

"Are you okay, Zim?" inquired Carol, tilting her head. He brushed some imaginary dirt from his uniform, paused, and gave her a strange look.

"Yes..." he said slowly, a strange zippered smile forming on his face, "I think I finally am."

The two girls only reponded with another strange look, but Zim shrugged them of with a small 'heh'. "I'm going to see my Dib-thing now," he told them, and without waiting for a response, he strolled out the door.

The girls looked at each other, eyebrows cocked, then turned and called out to him, "Come again!" as the bell tied to the doorframe jingled again and they heard the creak of the old wooden door. There was a moment of peace, then the two girls turned to each other again and gave each other the 'what the hell was that?' stare.

Outside, Zim was marching down the street, relief flooding his chest. He finally understood, and that was all that mattered. Without trying to sound cliche, it was like a weight had been lifted from him, and he was walking around on the moon. He went like that all the way to the hospital, with a knowing smile on his lips. Wasting no time, he scurried right into the giant double doors at the entrance and strait to Dib. He didn't even bother sitting down when he got in the room.

"I finally understand, Dib," he said, although Dib was completely still. Zim was hoping he would hear it even through his coma, but even if he didn't, he knew it needed to be said- If not for the boy for himself. "I finally understand why I went with you in the ambulance, why I was so upset to see you like this, why I did what I did. I think I finally understand. You've heard the phrase 'everyone needs someone'?" he asked the unresponding boy. With a pause for the answer that he knew wouldnt come, he continued, "I think I've figured it out. I never felt like I was doing anything before you came along, and I dont know if you feel the same, but you gave me purpose. You gave me reason. You gave me a chance to prove myself." Another pause to give an appreciative glance at the boy. "But then you did more. You gave me a reason to better myself, and you made me question everything I thought was right. Im not so sure I was right about my leaders now, and Im not so sure I was right about you. And I think I'm starting to... learn. On Irk you cant learn, you are given what you are given and that is what you do. You download. But I think I'm starting to use my brain now, and... and my heart."

He swept gracefully over to the boys bedside, near his face. "I think I understand why I care about you, Dib. You've made me into a better Irken and I owe so much to you, I couldn't have gotten this far without you. I care because... I need you now. I need you. And I think..." He leaned down to the boys face, letting his wig brush the boys bangs, slowly continuing at a whisper, "...I think I love you."

A flutter of eyelashes let him know that he had been heard, and he pressed another short, sweet kiss to the boys soft lips. No sound accompanied it, and it wasnt long before the boys heart rythm went back to normal. Zim knew his would never be the same though.

_Sigh._

_Smile._

_Beep - Beep._


	12. Admittance

(Zim's POV)

I still don't quite understand it, all I know is that it feels good. It felt good. To admit that out loud, to tell him. Those humans make such a fuss over those words, from what Ive seen anyways, and I never really got why. Maybe this is why, maybe its... not supposed to feel this good? Ah well, who cares? I know how I feel. Thats all...

It doesn't solve everything though. What if he wakes up and... doesnt feel the same way? What if he rejects me? No, he wouldn't reject... alrmighty Zim...

...It's been so long since I've called myself that.

It must've been... two years ago? No, It coudln't have been that long since I last called myself almighty Zim. Could it? Oh my Talle- No, I souldn't say that anymore, I'm turning human, I'm not even full Irken anymore. The locks of hair are proof enough of that. Hm... they're still so soft... I wonder when I'll have to cut them. Ah, what was I saying?

Oh yeah, back to back then... when I stopped calling myself 'almighty Zim'. Hah, it seems like it was so long ago. I think I stopped when... when I first realized what the hormones were doing to me. I remeber when the first little hairs started growing, I though I had fuzzy mold on my head. Haha, that was madness. I ran over to Dib's to scream at him for poisioning my precious scalp, and Gaz cought me first. Oh boy, that was... she threatened to pound my face in if I didn't shut up. What happened to her, I wonder?

(Normal POV)

Zim sighed and leaned back in his chair, moving both hands up to cradle the back of his head and interlacing them, making a cushion between his head and the wall. He had been lost in thought for a good while, staring absentmindedly at the resting Dib on the hospital bed. A sudden 'click' had him looking up, startled from his thoughts, at the sliding door, now closed, and Gaz, setting down a small black backpack, looking up at her big brother. "Hey," he said unsurely, "How was your day?"

"It was fine," she answered quietly. She stepped with trepidation over to him, staring quietly down at his sullen face and pale features. Zim paused, then silently got to his feet and walked up to her from behind, laying a green hand on her shoulder. She sighed and swallowed thickly, clenching her eyes shut, as if trying to block everything out. One tear ran down her check, and Zim gave a sad smile.

"It doesn't look like it was fine to me," he said, giving her a sympathetic glance. She shifted and turned away, crossing her arms tightly across her chest. He frowned and looked back to the ground. "What happened?" he asked.

"I just... can't take it," she choked. "I know I always seem like I don't care, I thought it would never come to this. And now it's too late to tell him..."

"He knows," Zim smiled.

Gaz sighed again, "...I know he does."

_Blip._

'You...'

Blip.

'You were right...' 


	13. Tease and An Exam

_A/N: See? I'm trying to make up for lost time..._

* * *

"What?" Gaz perked up some, confused by the completely out of the blue sentance. Zim felt himself flush a bit and smiled.

"You were right," he repeated. Gaz stared at him with one purple eyebrow cocked, looking at him like he was crazy. "I do love him."

Things finally clicked, shaping her mouth into an 'o'. Then she smiled lightly and gave him a playful punch on the shoulder. "Always knew you two would end up together," she teased, former sadness forgotten for the moment.

"Yeah," Zim responded, "'Cause enemies out to kill each other always end up changing their minds and falling in love." He elbowed her gently in the stomach, and she smiled, a real full smile. Zim felt good knowing he was able to make her feel better, that they could both get through this. But then she paused, and something pulled on her face, turning it pensive and thoughtful. "What is it?" inquired Zim.

"I just wonder... how will he feel when he wakes up?" she mused. There was talk of 'if', he had to. It was as simple as that, to both of them.

This caused Zims face to fall a bit. He mumbled, "Well, I think he heard me say it, so he knows..."

"Yeah," she cut in, "but I mean will he..."

"...feel the same?" Zim finished for her. Both paused for a somber moment before Zim answed, "I don't really care. So long as I can be there, I'll probably be fine. Then again, he might be angry at me... but wouldn't he have shown that? When he woke up before, I mean." He looked away, at the flawless white-washed walls, wishing for a fleeting moment his life could be that simple. Then a sigh overtook him again, and he went back to his chair, next to Gaz's own, and rested his head on his interwoven fingers, brought back against the wall again. She looked at him with concern, but didn't say anything.

A nurse came in, interrupting the thick silence between them, her not wanting to show her concern, him not wanting to think about rejection. "Uh, hi. We need some blood samples..." she mumbled.

"For what?" Zim raised a suspicious eyebrow. He didn't trust anyone in this hospital, not after what had already almost happened.

"Uh.. to um, check for infection, cause he's on broad spectrum anti-biotics to prevent them, but in case he gats anything... ya know." It was obvious she was very new, and simply following orders. She reeked of cheap perfume and hairpray, and was probably fresh out of collage. She had a very bubbly tone to her voice, even through her sheepishness.

"Alright," he consented, sounding bored.

"Oh, and uh, the professor wanted to tell you two not to worry, they're trying to tell how severe the damage is, but everyone's optimistic," she continued.

"Alright," he said again, begining to get impatient with the nurses presence. She briskly walked over to the boy and stuck a needle in his wrist, drawing blood, all the while aware of the overprotective Irken now watching her. She quickly left with her sample, almost bumping in to another doctor on his way in.

"Well, hello, I'm here to do a brief examination, you two should probably leave," he instructed in a deep, commanding voice.

"I think I'll stay right here," countered Zim, with an equally commanding voice. He folded his arms in front of him and leaned forward with an untrusting expression.

"Um, yes, well... alright." The doctor wasn't used to people standing up for themselves. They usually did everything he said.

"I'll stay too," said Gaz, moving back to lean against the wall by Zim. The doctor gave them a strange look, but nodded, and moved over to the boy. Without touching him he looked him over, glancing back and forth between papers. Both kept a wary eye on him.

_'Hm...'_

_Tap._

_Tap._


	14. Whats Going On?

The doctor continued to tap and shuffle his feet, examining the boy very closely. Zim kept a close eye on him, even as he nodded and left. When the clear sliding door shut, he and Gaz exchanges looks, somehwat worried, somewhat confused. "What do you think is going on?" Zim inquired.

"Not a clue," she answered quietly, folding her hand in her lap. Both looked to the tile distractedly, niether wanting to think about what he could be checking for. When he came back in, followed by another doctor and a nurse, they both looked up to see what they would do. However, surprisingly, they didn't do anything to Dib, only gave him another look over before pausing and giving an ominous nod to each other.

"What's going on?" asked Zim, once he found his voice. The first doctor looked at them sadly, before turning and whispering to his colleagues. Something about the way they were dodging his question made Zim edgy, and he narrowed his eyes at them, feeling himself tense up. "What's going on?" he repeated to the turned backs.

They all three hesitated, then turned around to face the two staring intently from their chairs. "Well..." began the nurse, not sounding very sure of herself. "...Are you sure you can handle it? You want to hear?" she asked tenatively. Stressed out families and friends weren't a good thing, and sometimes it was better just to say 'hes not doing well' than to fully explain it.

Zmis eyes widened, and he sat up strait in his chair, slightly alarmed. "What is it? Do you... know how bad he's hurt now?" Gaz seemed a bit frightened at this thought too, and sat stiff in her chair as well.

"Um, yes..." she said quietly, shifting on her high heels and staring down at her feet. "Well, not completely," she corrected herself, "but we have a better idea and..." She coughed down an uncomfortable sigh. "...It's not pretty."

Zim's eyes were wide with horror, so that his contacts were almost falling out. Gaz, begining to shake, sunk back into her chair, crossing her arms in a loose hug against her chest. It was almost too much, but Zim managed to ask with only a slight quiver in his voice, "What's wrong with him?"

_Sigh._

Gulp.

'He...' 


	15. He

"He..." the nurse repeated. She bit her lip, not wanting to go on. She wished it weren't always she who had to break the bad news. Turning to the doctor she silently begged for him to do it, so that the two wouldn't hate her. She was going to have to check up on the patient, and they would most likely be there every time. 

He nodded, shoulders drooping in a sigh. "Please, calm down, you two," he instructed.

"Well it's not very easy when you won't tell us what the hell is wrong with my Dib," Zim snapped back, getting to his feet. He had had just about enough of this, he wanted answers. With fists clenched at his sides, he glowered, "Now tell me what's going on in the hospital or I'll find out myself, and trust me, that wont be pretty."

The doctor merely sighed, looking very old and worn. "You may want to sit down for this," he said. Zim begrudgingly did as he was told, and the doctor continued, "Now your friend was in a pretty serious hit-and-run accident, and I want you both to realize just how serious it was. You were at the scene, right?" he directed a question to Zim. The Irken nodded slowly, wishing he'd get on with it. "Well," he continued, "it was a very serious accident, he's lucky to be alive, even though he's just barely. After reviewing his notes, and the notes from surgury, and examining him, we think we've come to some conclusions."

Zim nodded, staring at them. He could only take in what he said, he stopped any speculation before it even began. Gaz reached for his hand, clasping it in her own for comfort, although not in a romantic way. Barely even noticing the others actions he motioned for him to go on.

"We think your friend may be paralyzed."

Zim was too shocked to even respond, he only stared at the doctors, expecting more, expecting answers, explanations, anything. Gaz squeezed his hand, biting back tears.

"He fractured several vertebrae, and upon further exam, it appears he's also severed his spinal cord at the neck, although we're not one hundred percent sure. If this is true, howver, it means that his muscels below the neck wont work, and probably wont ever work. He might still be able to move his neck, if he's lucky, but theres still a chance that he'll be completely paralyzed. In any case, the most likely scenario is that he'll be stuck in this hospital, connected to these machines..." he gave short sigh, "... for the rest of his life."

_Blip._

_Blip._

_Blip._


	16. Another Latte

_A/N: Well, sorry to say, but I have a trip coming up so I wont be able to update next week. Sorry for being so scatterbrained with updates lately, hopefully things will return to normal next Monday._

* * *

Zim stood up, in a complete panic. "No! NO! That can't be, you're wrong, you have to be..." a dizzy spell caught him, forcing him back into his seat, the shock make him tremble and stare, horrified, into nothingness. Gaz fared no better, keeping a firm grip on the aliens hand as tears spilled over onto her face until she burst, burying her features, contorted by anguish and pain, in her free arm.

"If you need a few moments alone to absorb it, we can leave," said the second doctor, who hadn't spoken up before.

"N-no," stuttered Gaz through her heavy sobs. "L-let's..." she stood, somehow, and dragged Zim up with her, who was in too much shock to protest. She took off runing at full speed, pulling Zim along by the wrist, not wanting to see any of it, not wanting to hear anymore, not wanting to feel the horrible regret and sorrow. They rushed past the small group and out the door, Zim somehow keeping up in his daze. It was only as they turned the corner and found themselves at the cafe that Gaz finally stopped and collapsed into a weeping mass on the floor, huddling in a ball. Zim stood at her side, staring off into space, expressionless.

It took him a while to notice Gaz, curled up at his feet, whimpering through tears. He looked at her, mouth open, and only then did it hit him. Tears welled at the corners of his eyes, and he stared up at the blinding white ceiling lights, trying to calm himself. It didn't stop them from rolling down his face as it contracted into complete sorrow and grief. He lowered his head, not wanting to show his tears, and begining to shake as she had, until he fell to his knees, bawling into his hands. He tried to stop himself, not wanting all the people there to stare at him, but at the same time he couldn't stop. Gaz continued shaking, but eventually uncurled and sat up, wiping her face.

"Zim..." she mumbled in a broken voice, trying to get his attention. His hand never moved off his face, and his erratic breathing never even paused. His gloves were wet from all the tears he had shed. "Zim, please, let's get coffee or something..." she begged.

"T-this is all my fault," he cried, moving his hands from his face and bracing himself on the ground, feeling as though he may fall over any second.

"Hey, c'mon, don't talk like that," she said. "You weren't driving the car, you didn't push him, it was just an accident, a stupid accident."

"A stupid accident that ruined his life!" shouted Zim, face turning dark green. "It's all my fault," he repeated, "if I hadn't-"

"Zim, stop it!" she yelled. "Stop wallowing in self-pity and get over it! You want to talk, fine, lets get some coffee and we can talk all you want, but this isnt helping anyone! Blaming youself doesnt help anyone." She was clearly sick of it, just wanting something to go right.

Zim sniffled, shocked by her outburst, but nodded slowly. "Coffee... that sounds good," he murmbled.

"Well we're gonne need something, with all this crying we're going to get dehydrated," she said, attempting a joke. She got no response from Zim but a small nod, and stretched out her hand to help him up. He took it and they stood up together. With shaky steps they made their way over to the order booth, and the man was so concerned after seeing their crying fit that he gave them a pair of free latte's. They sat down and stirred for a bit, absentmindedly staring into the swirls made by the whipped cream.

_Swish._

_Slosh._

_'So...'_


	17. Anymore

"...What happened to you?" 

Zim wasn't exactly sure where it had come from, but the question from earlier came back to him. "I mean," he explained, "why did you change? When I first came here you acted like you dont care at all, and now... I mean, sometimes you still act like you dont care, but I've seen you actually show emotions now."

Gaz looked down at her coffee, taking a long sip that ended with a sigh. "Actually, I think you're to blame for that," she said. "Remeber when you blew up the city with that time-stasis experiment?" Zim gave her a look of confusion and she explained, "Dib told me about it. Well, when I found him knocked out I thought he was dead and realized that I never showed any affection to him. I really did care, all those years. I was just too stubborn to show it. I got bullied as a kid for having him be my brother, so I had to act tough to be respected, and I guess that act turned real." She let out a sad sigh. "I tried to calm it down, because I knew that no one would mess with me anymore. I never did tell Dib, bacause, well... I thought it was his fault. But I guess I realized then that it wasn't his fault, it was mine for letting them get to me. ...I missed out on so much because of that."

She continued to stir her latte, seeming much older than she ought to have been. It occured to Zim that those two children had probably been through mor ein their life than some adults, and he couldnt help but feel sorry for them now. "Hey, you can't change the past," he said, trying to comfort her, "you should let go and accept what happened."

"...Yeah, look who's talking," she resonded with a sly look. This cause Zims face to fall again, but she soon continued. "Actually, the one piece of the story that never made sense to me, is he said he passed out at your feet, but woke up in the ruins of his own house, with me there. How does that work?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. The alien's face heated up at this memory.

"Oh, well, uh... I couldn't just leave him there, I needed to rebuild too, besides, I kinda outdid myself that time, I figured I owed him a free out for that. Stop laughing, so I carried him home, so?" he folded his arms and looked at her crossly.

She cracked a smile. "I wasn't laughing, dork."

"You were on the inside," he insisted. She simply rolled her eyes.

After a pause she went on, "...so Irkens do have hearts."

"Hey, we're capable of..." he caught himself. Only defectives were capable of feelings like that. This cause him to flush a bit more, out of embarrassment. "Well, I'm capable of compassion."

"Compassion towards the enemy?" she asked, incredelous.

"He's not my enemy anymore..." he said, with a slight smile, though it was laden with sadness.

_Tap._

_Sip._

* * *

_Bounus chapter 'cause I might as well! KTHXBAI._


	18. Another Ben n' Jerrys Binge

Gir knew something was wrong when Zim came home later that night with another quart of ice cream and a box of tissues. "Hi, master! What going on?" he inquired, with the same bubbly tone he always used. However, he was soft with his affectionate hug, something he only did when he could tell Zim was feeling fragile. Somehow that little robot knew things, even through his innocence. 

Zim sighed and hugged him back, a rare gesture. "Nothing, Gir," he replied automatically, finding it easier not to explain when the robot would'nt catch on anyway.

Gir seemed to accept this. "Okay," he chirped, with a sqeek from Minimoose following, late to welcome him home. "You wanna watch some more TV?" he asked.

"Yes, I-" he almost replied but something caught. He could hear Dib's heart moniter beeping in the background. "The moniter..." he mumbled. "Gir, could you... turn off Dib's watch camera? Please? And... and tell me how he's doing." He hadn't gone back to Dibs room after he and Gaz had had coffee. He couldn't bear to go back and see his precious face, his broken body. It all hurt too much. He had hung out around the city until it got dark, then walked home in the dreary cold. It had almost started drizzling, but the waether managed to hold.

Gir nodded and bounced cheerfully to the screen where Dib lay in his hospital bed. "Ya know it was smart of you to put a spy camera in there," he said, trying to cheer Zim up. "You smart, master." Zim only blinked and looked down. Gir frowned at not benig able to make him smile, but turned off the moniter and walked back over to him. "It's okay, master, things'll get better," he smiled. Zim looked up at this, and gave his own weak grin.

"I hope so..." he whispered. Gir beamed.

"Now lets go watch s'more TV!" he squealed, grabbing the aliens wrist and dragging him towards the couch. Zim stumbled along, almost dropping the ice cream but keeping his balance, and plunked down on the cushions alongside his faithful robot, with Minimoose hovering in the background. They once again ate all the ice cream (double fudge turtle brownie dough with caramel swirls), and sat up late watching excitable Japanese schoolgirls try to save the world and not trip over their heels at the same time. Zim once again slumped over on the couch, asleep, but this time Gir asked Minimoose to get the blanket, so he could keep a hold on the alien. Gir didn't want Zim havnig any more bad dreams.

"It's okay, master..." he cooed, stroking the Irken's face. Zim sighed in his sleep, but didn't make any other moves. Minimoose floated down and landed on Gir's head, resting there. Eventually both andriods went into sleep mode, with nothing to do, and they stayed at peace, listening as it finally started drizzling outside, with a soft pattering on the windows.

_Pitter._

_Patter._

_Yawn._


	19. Waffles!

Zim woke up witha soft yawn, stretching and uncurling his antenna like a cat would its tail. He blinked, feeling something metalic wrapped around him. Glancing down curiously he smiled at his faithful servant, who was snoring peacefully in Sleep Mode. He shifted and picked him up wihtout disturbing him, placing him on the couch. Minimoose was hovering idily, a gentle whir indidcating that he was in his Sleep Mode too. Zim smiled. The two were so innocent together, it touched a soft spot in his heart. He gave them an endearing look and sat up. 

Getting to his feet, Zim turned off the television and shuffled to the kitchen. He could hear rain, much heavier than earlier that night. "Hope it doesn't get too stormy..." he mumbled. His hoped were dashed when a huge burst of light, followed by a loud crash and a sheet of rain pounded on the windows. He jumped back, alarmed, but then flew forward as Gir attacked him, just barely catching himself.

"MASTER BIG SCARY NOISE!" he cried, clinging to the back of Zim's head. Zim froze, frightened by the robot's sudden appearness, but then then began to laugh.

"It's okay Gir," he chuckled, pulling him off of his head, "It's only a little-" Another large crash interupted him, prompting Gir to clutch the front of his shirt. "...storm. It'll pass," he encouraged, gently petting the robots shoulders.

"You sure?" he asked, looking up with puppy eyes.

"Of course," he replied, smiling. Minimoose came floating lazily in, prompting a cheery, "Good morning." A tired squeak was the only answer, and Zim couldnt help but giggle. He felt so happy today, and he no idea why. It actually felt like things might turn out alright. "Hey Gir," he said, adressing the lump that had crawled under his shirt for comfort, "How about you make some waffles for me, hm? I could sure use some food." It was true, he hadn't eaten or slept properly in- "Ohhh," he mumbled to himself. That was why he felt so good; he had had an actually rest.

"Waffles?" chirped Gir, popping his head out of the front of Zims shirt. Zim laughed a 'yes'. "Waffles!" cheered the robot. Minimoose gave a dull squeak, and Gir replied, "And some coffee too? Okay." He began to whistle and pull ingediants out- surprisingly, after a few years on the new planet, Gir had become somethign of a chef. He still liked to try strange new things, but if prompted, he could bake delicious gormet meals.

Zim stepped out of the kitchen as inconspicuously as possible. He moved over to the still blank moniter in the living room. After a moment of hesitation, he clicked the button, and there was Dib once again, laying still in his bed, an assortment of tubes and wires still connected to him. Zim flinched- it never got any easier to see. A nurse came in with a roll of gauze, to change his bandages. Zim gave a light smile- at least they were treating him well. He only wished... things would keep improving. '_They could only get better from here, right?_' he pondered. '_Oh great, now I sound like Gir,_' he teased himself. Content with what he saw he walked back into the kitched, where Gir had donned a chefs hat and apron.

"Do you want waffles in your waffles?" he asked cheerfully, turning momentarily from the pans on the stove.

"Hm, how about blueberries? Do we have any?" he asked. He had grown a liking to much of the Earth food, especially anything sweet. Sweet things on Irk were rare, only very important people (such as the Tallests) got them. But here on Earth, they were over-flowing with snacks. It would make the Tallest jealous if they knew how much he had. At first he had figured that was why they had chose him, but due to his recent re-thinkings, he wasn't too sure about them. And thinking about the Tallest got him thinking- when was the last time he called them? What would they do if they knew what had happened, what he felt? What about what he had said to Gaz- 'He's not my enemy anymore.' He couldn't imagine battling Dib for Earth anymore, so... was he giving up? How would-

"Waffles!" exclaimed Gir, holding a plate of navy speckled, syrup covered goodness up to Zims face. He jumped, but then said a quiet 'Thank you' and slid into his chair. He poked at them idily with his fork, contemplating the whole new cans of worms he had just opened. "Master? You quiet," pointed out the robot.

"Yes, I know," responded Zim, trying to put on a smile for him. "I just need to think for a b-" Another flash of light and a bang had Gir clinging to Zims chest again. He laughed. "I should take you to see these two girls I met, they would like you," he said.

_Ring._

_Ring._


	20. Lieing to the School

"Hm?" Zim's antenna perked up. "Telephone? Who would call...?" he pondered aloud. Setting Gir down on the floor he walked into the living room, picking up the reciever with an unsure, "Hello?" 

"Um, Nyesss, this is Ms. Andreas," answered a stuffy voice, "I'm calling for the skool, I am wondering if you were aware that Zim missed all his afternoon classes yesterday, and as of today he has not been counted present in homeroom."

Zim slapped his forehead in a 'duh' motion. He had completely forgotten aobut skool today. He quickly gathered himself and responded, "Um, yes, Zim is sick, very sick, he went home yesterday."

"Thats not what it shows here on my records," she replied haughtily.

Zim rolled his eyes. Of all the times for the skool to start caring... "Listen, he went home and isn't feeling well. Would you please update your records? Thank you." He hung up without waiting for an answer and sighed.

"Master, what is it?" said Gir, who came tip-toeing into the room.

"Nothing, Gir," he said, scooping the robot up in his arms. "What do you say we go out today. I have some people I want to talk to, and I'm sure you'd love to meet them." Gir gave him a scared look, which was very unusal; Zim was expecting happiness. The robot usually loved meeting new people. "What's wrong?" he inquired.

"Do we have to go out... there?" he pointed out the nerest window, where it was gloomy and dark, not to mention raining buckets. Gir had learned that rain could be a bad thing, ever since the time he went out and short-circuited. Zim had to work on him for hours to wake him up again, and even then he was slightly rusted in his knee from the experience. Zim had had to replace it about a year ago, and it was much shinier than the rest of the robot. Rain was the only thing Gir was afraid of, and he acted much like Zim used to.

"Yes, but don't worry, I'll protect you. I've got an umbrella. Besides, your dog suit is nearly water-proof, so you won't get hurt," he encouraged.

Gir looked up at him with fright in his eyes. "You sure?"

"Yes," Zim replied, "Absolutely. Now let's go."

"But what about the waffles..." the android whined.

"Oh yes! Almost forgot. Let's eat before we leave, huh?" he smiled. Gir nodded happily and ran back into the kitchen, Zim trailing behind. They began to eat, Gir going on about how he made the 'Delisheez Blueburry Wafflies'.

_Chatter._

_CRASH._

_Laugh._


	21. Out in the Storm

After pulling Gir off of his head again and reassuring him that he would be fine in the storm, Zim went to his 'room' and picked out another outfit. It was a black tee-shirt and a pair of jeans, nothing too fancy, apart from his trademark choker and sneakers. Over it he wore a huge, muddy brown raincoat, the oversized hood completely covering his hair. "C'mon Gir," he called, leash in hand. The little robot came running, fully dressed in his green doggy costume. It was a miracle Zim hadn't needed to replace it, but that was the wonder of Irken technology. 

"Minimoose, hold down the fort, and don't let anyone..." he trailed off, realizing that not letting anyone in was pointless when there wasn't a Dib to 'not let in'. He felt an ache in his chest an moved his hand up to rest there. "Um... nevermind," he mumbled, turning away. "Just don't break anything, okay?" he asked. Minimoose squeaked happily and Gir saluted goodbye to his friend.

They stepped outside the door, and Gir's entire demanor immediately changed. He clung to Zim's legs and looked out at the splashes on the wet concrete, wimpering. "It's okay Gir," Zim tried to comfort him. Another crash of lightning and thunder had the robotic green dog jumping up on his head. "Gir!" Zim exclaimed, trying to keep holding up the umbrella with one hand and stop Gir from hurting him with the other. "Get off!" he ordered. The robot only wimpered some more. "Now!" he said, yanking at the comstume's black ears. With a yelp he was pulled down and set on the sidewalk. He looked up, hurt, but then looked ahead at the rainsoaked walk, visibly shaking. With a glance down at the poor robot, Zim sighed, "Okay, I can carry you suppose."

The little robot perked up at this and jumped into Zims arm, the other one stopping the water from pouring down on the both of them with the black umbrella. Zim began to walk to the end of the yard and down the steet, through the downpour. There was surprisingly little wind, so carrying the umbrella and robot wasn't too big a strain. He secretly wished that he could use Gir's rockets, but he knew that the android would be too scared for that, and he was too nervous about arousing suspicion. Although he had been on Earth long enough to know that nobody would notice him, he didn't want to take any chances. He had almost been cuaght enough times to put a good bit of caution in him.

A sudden gust of wind nearly knocked the alien off his feet. He stumbled and hunched over, clinging to Gir and gripping the umbrella, hoping it wouldn't blow away. He felt a sheet of rain hit his back and held tight to the robot, protecting him from the water. Once the wind died down a little he straitened up and tried to adjust the umbrella, leaning it back a bit to keep himself dry, or at least to stop himself from getting any wetter. The washed out, clay colored raincoat was dripping with water on the back. "Gir, climb inside my jacket," he said to the little bundle of green fur cradled in his arm. The robot coplied, huddling snugly between the waterproof coat and fabric of Zims shirt.

The Irken kept a loose hold on him as he walked, umbrella still tilting to stop the rain. It was raining heavily now, and Zim was walking as afst as he could, desperate to get the coffee shop and get out of the rain. It wouldn't burn his skin without prolonged exposure, but he was still afraid, for Gir's sake. The robot was gently quivering against his chest, held loosely with one Irken claw. A crash of thunder sounded in the distance, momentarily illuminating the sky and everything around it with one spindily branch of light. Zim gave a start at the sudden light, but continued, Gir clinging to him even harder.

He was soon walking down the rows of shops, looking warm and inviting compared to the outside, dark and wet. There weren't any people outside becasue of the weather, and Zim had only passed the occasional car. It seemed nobody wanted to go out in this storm. He continued, looking for the coffee shop sign amongst the many shops. A single black car came screetching around the corner and sped down the street, and went right through a huge puddle, right next to Zim. With a startled "Ah!" Zim turned away to avoid the splash. He reacted just a second late. Immediately turning to his reflection in a shop window he began to wipe at his cheek, which was already begining to warm up. He felt a faint tingle as the last of it got wiped away by the collar of his shirt. "You okay, Gir?" he asked, continuing to rub at his face his his hand. The robot gave a quiet nod against his shirt, and Zim turned to keep walking. However, his reflection caught his eye at the last second. To be specific, the reflection of the black umbrella he was carrying.

_Splishes of rain hit the ground, dirtying his boots with splatters of brown. He didn't trust himself to look up, but found himself staring foreward, at the front of a sea of black. Umbrellas bloomed up like deathly flowers from the crowd, and the only thing to contrast it was a large ivory box in the middle of everything._

"Hey!" Zim looked up, wide eyed, to see Carol waving at him up ahead. "Get out of the rain, you crazy!" She was smiling, leaning out the door of the shop, barely protected by the canopy overlooking a set of tables and chairs. Zim blinked, then shivered at the memory of his dream.

"Alright," he called back, turning to leave the half-mirror. He broke into a run, realizing how badly he wanted to be out of the rain and into the warm shop. A latte would probably help calm his nerves, too. As he approached, Carol began to laugh.

"How are you, Zim?" she chuckled. He certainly looked different than the last time she had seen him.

"Uh... we'll talk," he said unsurely, slowing to a walk and giving a weak smile as he shook her hand. He stepped in, letting the warm air wash over him, a welcome relief from the dreary outside.

_Drip-Drop._

_Chime._

_Click._


	22. Gir meets Girls

_A/N: Alright, time to bore you to death with useless information! No, just kidding. Im just putting it here because I feel like I need to explain some things. _

_This fic takes place about three years in the future, where Dib is 14 gong on 15, it's August (they start school early, huh?) and it's long after all the 'canon' events in the show. Zim, who has decided to take hormones in order to keep up with Dib height wise, is changing mentally and physically. I always figured that the reason Irkens were burned by water is because of their Ph. I figured they have a much higher Ph and thus were very sensitive to acidity, so something like water would burn them easily. However, during his transformation, Zim's body has dropped in Ph, lower than any normal Irken, so that he still burns, but not as quickly or severely. Someone pointed out that he did not burn from the water last chapter, (which is not true, byt the way, it does say that it began to burn) so that's the explanation for that. _

_Zim is begining to use his brain. He can doubt, he can think for himself, he can invent, and most improtantly, he can feel emotions. He's turning into something more than he was in the show. He's turning into a human. No, he will never be fully human, but because of his stay on Earth he's changing. That is why he is so 'Out of Character', because his character has changed completely! That's kind of why I wrote this, I know I could have dont it will 'canon' Zim, but I decided that it would be much more interesting with 'my' Zim. However, on that note, check this out. Someone wanted the story with a normal Zim so bad, they wrote it! I personally think that's awesome beyond belief, and in my opinion its a great story. I can't wait to see where it goes. It's called Cant Take It Back, and I cant wait for more. You should check it out too. And please, no flames. I understand if you want to defend the story, but it's a good story in its own right, and I gave full permission for him to write it. You can find it right here. http:// www . fanfiction . net / s / 3652195 / 1 / _

_Now, if you still have complaints, write them in, and I'll try to see what I can do, although that'll probable be throw an excuse into an Authors Note or reply or whatever. Now then, enjoy the story! grumblestupidauthorsnotelongerthanthechaptergrumble_

* * *

With a sigh of relief Zim stood inside, Carol closing the door behind them with the ring of a bell. As the door clicked shut, Zim heard a laugh. "I thought that was your scream," said Tiff, smiling. She was in her uniform, standing behind the counter with a fresh steaming cup of coffee in her hands. 

Zim gave a small half-smile, although the memory of the nitemare still lingered in his thoughts. Between that and the rain he didn't feel much like smiling. He didn't feel much like himself at all, in fact. Smiling and gloating was still one of his trademarks, even after all the years he had spent on Earth. With a half-hearted wave he mumbled a "Hello," and set down his dripping wet umbrella. "I brought someone I thought you'd like to meet," he said. Shedding his coat but still supporting it, he revealed the furry green dog clinging to his chest. Trying to coax him to look up he whispered, "Gir, we're here."

The robot looked up to see the blonde walking towards him with a smile and a sing-song, "Hey there, puppy."

"Hi!" he gleefully responded.

Both girls gave a wide-eyed stare, and Tiff's mouth seemed to hang open a bit. Carol took a cautious step back, and Zim chuckled nervously, "Um, yeah, I taught him to do that..."

Gir leaped down and stared up at Tiff, who was dumbstruck staring down at him. "Hi there pretty lady," the little robot beamed. She closed her mouth and leaned back a bit, looking a bit frightened.

"He doesn't bite," Zim encouraged. She gave him a look that quetioned his sanity but he just gave her a tiny smile. "C'mon."

"Uh... hi there?" she said. Carol looked at both of them waiting for something to happen next.

"Mommy!" the dog screamed, and ran up to her, hugging her legs tightly.

Tiff, badly startled, looked down almost as if she was going to tell him to get off, but her heart melted at the sight of the thing nuzzling her knee high socks. "Aww," sighed Carol, holding back her giggles, "it likes you." Tiff cracked a smile too. "How'd you teach him to do that?" asked Carol, leaning back on the door. Tiff was busy crouching down and rubbing behind Gir's ears.

"Patience," replied Zim. He was more proud that Gir didn't scare her into tears, but decided to keep that to himself. He kept a half-smirk on his face as he watched the two playing together, and it widened when Carol decided to join them. In the end they were both sitting on their knees patting Gir's head and scratching under his chin. The robot was the perfect happy puppy. Zim stood and watched them admire the Irken android feeling a small hint of satisfaction. '_Dib, if you could see me now. Enjoying other peoples happiness. I don't think you'd believe it,_' he mused.

"So Zim," said Carol, standing with a flip of her red hair, "what brings you here? Besides your dog I mean."

The chirps of 'good puppy' died down, and Tiff looked up. "Actually, yeah, shouldn't you be in school?"

"Well," he sighed, shifting his weight, "as it turns out, things are getting more... complicated."

Tiff and Carol exchanged glances, then Carol pushed, "Go on."

_"Well..."_

_"I..."_

_Sigh._


	23. Arguement

Zim shifted his weight again, crossing his arms across his chest. "It's kind of hard to explain..." he mumbled. All the hapiness slid off of his face, and he turned to the window, not wanting to have to see the girls expectant looks. Staring out the window he began to tap his foot, thinking about how he should try to tell them everything that had happened. As the watched the rain drip down the window something occured to him. 

"I... I'm being selfish, aren't I?" he asked suddenly. Both girls stayed silent. "I shouldn't come here just to tell you everything thats wrong. You have your own lives." With a plasterd on smile he turned back to them. "Just have fun with Gir, it's no big deal."

Carol raised an eyebrow and stood, Gir cradled in her arms. "You're a horrible lair, you know," she said.

"Yes, I know," replied the Irken.

"Well, I want to hear," insisted Carol. Tiff looked up at her with a raised eyebrow, giving her a 'what are you doing?' gesture.

"No," he said, feeling overdramatic, "this is my burden."

Tiff narrowed her eyes and stood next to Carol, brushing off her apron and half turning, before realizing that Carol wasn't coming back behind the counter with her. Standing stock still the red-head held the green and black dog tight and demanded, "I want to hear what's going on. I care about you and this kid."

Zim huffed and crossed his arms, matching her pose. "Why? What have I ever done to warrant your concern?" he countered.

"You need help," she said. "You need someone to talk to. You can't deal with this all on your own. And you might as well talk to me and Tiff."

Tiff cleared her throat and scratched her arm uncomfortably at being included. "Carol, can we talk?" The girl blinked and turned to look at the other, giving her the same 'what are you doing?' glare. "Come on," she said, grabbing the other girls wrist and pulling her hastily into the girls bathroom. Shocked, Zim only stared at the little display.

"Here little guy, wait outside," instructed Carol, pushing Gir out the door. The robot-dog giggled happily and waved to Zim, who finally snapped out of his daze. Tip-toeing up to the door he heard them talking, but he couldnt make it out clearly. He tried to press his head to the door, so that his antenna could make it out, but the wig muffled it too much.

"Gir, come here," he whispered.

Just as the robot was bout to scream 'OOOOKEY DOKEY!' there was a flash and another crash of thunder, causing Gir to jump and cling on to his head, knocking his wig sideways a bit. "Gir!" he whispered harshly, re-adjusting his wig. "Gir, can you amplify what they're saying?" he asked.

"You always do this!" A shout from inside cause him to jump back.

"Maybe we wont need that after all," he mumbled. He pressed his head onto the door again, trying to make out the muffled arguement.

"You dont know..." Tiff was saying something, but obviously keeping her cool better than Carol.

"He's just a kid! How am I not supposed to... You're more selfish..." "...Like I dont Care! I do!" "Well then why-" "Because! He's just a kid, its not my job..." "...not everyday you... like this... You're just being stuck up." Zim heard footsteps getting closer to the door, and in a panic tried to back away and make himself look inconcspicuous. "Whatever Carol. Maybe I'm trying to look out for you."

_Step._

_Creak._

_Slam._


	24. Accusation

Carol stormed out of the door after Tiff. "Oh? And what's that supposed to mean?" Neither noticed Zim failing horribly at trying to look like he hadn't been listening. 

"You can't care about every sob story who comes your way," Tiff said.

She gave an exasperated sigh. "Oh come on, being helpful never hurt anyone."

"Being helpful to him might!" she insisted, pointing a finger at Zim.

Carols jaw fell at how obvious she had made her dislike. "What are you talking about?"

"Thats the kid that Membrane's son always said was an alien! And now what happened to him? He was in a car accident! You know what I think? I think it was no accident!" she shouted, whipping around to face him.

It was hard to tell who was more horrified, Carol or Zim. His mouth hung open in shock. Zim coudn't find his voice for a long moment, before he finally stuttered, "I- I- I w-would never..."

Carol found her voice next. "How could you even say... how could you accuse him of that? Next you'll be saying he IS an alien!"

"Maybe he is!" countered Tiff. "I mean come on, Ive never seen a skin condition like that, and that dog? Probably some kind of alien pet." Gir perked up on the top of Zims head at the mention of himself.

Zims eyes were so wide his contacts were almost falling out. His heart was pounding in his chest, and he almost didn't dare to breathe. He was frozen in fear, and his antenna were hard pressed against his scalp. "I- I- please, I..." he continued in vain to try to sputter a defense. Backing away, mind filling with panic, he shouted, "It wasn't my fault!"

Tiff sneered. "Doesn't it make perfect sense? Dib was getting in his way with his constant accusations. So he decided to get him into a little accident," she explained slowly to Carol. She paused and turned halfway to Zim, "Guess _he_ won't be a problem anymore, huh?"

Zim felt like he was being held underwater; everything seemed like a surreal nightmare and he couldn't breathe. "Please," he begged, "please, it's not like that, you have to believe me..."

"Believe you?" she scoffed, "Why should I b-"

"Because I love him!" he burst, clenching eyes shut, hoping it would get rid of the wetness at the corner of his eyes. A tear slid down his cheek, and he began to tremble, showing how scared he really was. Both girls stared in stunned silence. "I mean, I think I do," he began to ramble, "I dont know what else it could be, I've never felt this way before, that must be it." he opened his eyes, just barely. "Dib..." he whispered, in a soft plea, although he couldn't be sure what he was asking for. His face was turned to the floor beneath his feet.

With a sudden jerk he looked up at the two girls, wide-eyed. "I... I have to..." he stumbled back, bumping into the door. He glanced around, spotting his coat draped over the back of a chair. With a quick look towards them he darted forward, snatching it and hastily pulling it over his head and Gir. He rushed for the door, pushing it open and sprinting out into the still-pouring rain.

"Zim!" Carol snapped out of her trance and rushed after him, hiting the door just as the bell chimed, signaling its close. She pushed it open, Tiff looking on in shock, and ran out after him. "Zim!" she shouted, just as another roll of thunder echoed in the street. Zim kept dashing down the sidewalk, holding the hood in place to stop the gusts of wind from exposing him to the storm again. However, he still help wetness sliding down his face. The fact that it didn't burn told him it wasn't rain.

_Flash._

_Crash._

_'Zim!'_


	25. Another Chase

Carol sprinted down the streets, ignoring the rain slamming into her and the thunder and lightning crashing all around her. With each step a spray flew up behind her, and she got a little farther from the fleeing green teenager, whos muddy brown coat was flapping behind him in the harsh wind. "Zim!" she cried out again, only to have him come to the corner. With a skid he stopped himself and swiftly turned, dashing to get away. A quick glance her way as he turned revealed grey-blue eyes, and a tear sliding down his cheek. For a split second, he hesitated mid-step, but continued his escape, Gir pulling the hood over himself tightly and stifling his wimpers in Zim's messy, het-black wig.

She sprinted forward, desperate not to lose him in the storm. Quickly turning the corner she saw him and continued the chase. She was panting now, and trying to catch her breath, not used to having to run great distances. Zim however could keep it up all the way to the hospital. That's where he was headed. He needed to talk to Dib, even though he knew Dib couldn't answer him. And he needed to apologize. For everything. A little time with the boy, even though it was almost like being alone, would do him good. He needed to think.

"Zim, come back, please!" He automatically looked back at the girl chasing him. She was sopping wet, hair windswept, and her mascara was lightly running. With each step a few drops of water fell behind her. Ashamed he looked forward and ran even faster, bowing his head. '_Look what I've done,_' he thought. The distressed girl continued to chase him, calling out, "Stop! Zim!"

He dodged across the street, but not before stopping and looking- the accident was still fresh in his mind. Carol was only half a block away when he ran across the street, quickly catching up with him now that his momentum had been lost. Catching her second wind she sprinted forward through the downpour and to the curb. Leaping off, past the small current rushing to the drain pipes. However as she did, she noticed a twin pair of lights reflecting off the slick street. She stopped, mid step, and froze, staring at the grill of a car quickly approaching.

Zim heard a startled squeal, and swiftly whipped around. Immediately his eyes widened behind his contacts, and he froze, mouth hanging open. A car was careening forward, feet from Carol, who was standing stunned in the middle of the road. Terror rose in his chest, complete panic filled him, and he felt like shouting out, but at the same time something caught in his throat. Visions of Dib, laying on the ground, flashed before his eyes, but this time rain trickled down, mingling with blood and short, red hair.

"N- No!" he cried out, at the last second and, too horrified by what he knew was coming next, buried his face in his hands. He heard a skid, a screetch of tires, and then nothing. The rain continued to pound down all around him, and he stood shaking, rooted to the spot to too scared to remove his hands from his eyes. He knew what he would see if he looked up, he _knew_ it, and yet it couldn't be true, it just couldn't. He began to sob into his hands, shaking all over, barely holding himself up.

Then he heard a yell from down the block.

"Carol!"

Tiff had followed her friend. Zim still couldn't bear to look, all he could do was cry into his palms, praying that this somehow couldn't be real.

_Splish._

Splash.

Sob. 


	26. Stop Crying

"Carol, are you okay?" came a half-shout, clearly from Tiff. Zim stood still in the rain, unable to move or think, covering his face. He heard the splashing through the puddles, meaning she was dashing up to her friend. There was a quick pause, and then he heard more splashes heading his way. He froze, waiting for the angry shouts of blame that would no doubt come his way. However, his antenna piqued, sensing that something was unusual; He thought he heard more splashes than he should have coming his way. Almost too scared too look, he hesitated, gathering up the courage to see if his hopes were true. With trepidation, as the footsteps came closer, he began to peel his hands away from his tearstained cheeks to peer out into the storm. 

Then, suddenly he lost his nerve, and buried his face again. He couldn't look, he couldn't bear to see another person like Dib had been. The splattering footsteps caught up to him, and he inhaled sharply, waiting for something, silent sobs wracking his body. A cold, wet hand grabbed his wrist, and he gave a small start, but didn't glance up.

"Zim, stop crying."

Eyes widened in shock, he tore his face away and stared up. A pale, but otherwise unharmed Carol stood with one hand clutching his wrist, and the other at her side, holding Tiff's hand. The owner had obviously been dragged along without consent, but had an unsure expression on he face.

Zim's quivering mouth hung open, but managed to sputter a soft, "You... but you were... the car..."

"Swerved and missed at the last second," she tried to comfort him.

Mouth still hanging open, he began to register a burning feeling on his wrist. With a small gasp he pulled it back out of her hand and hid it in the sleeve of his coat. Turning again to the red-head, he realized that the wind had nearly died down, although it was still generously raining. He stared at her for moment, eyed still wide with disbelief. Dry sobs began and he clutched his chest, trying to make the flutter in his squeedily-spooch go away. "I thought- I thought... you..." he managed to stutter out. He began to shake as he tried to say more.

A crash of thunder and a whine from Gir on top of his head reminded him that the relative calm would only be temporary. "L- l- let's..." he gave up on speech and pointed a shaking finger towards a building with an awning protecting a small set of tables and chair. Carol nodded, but Tiff interjected, "Well, someone needs to be at the Cafe, so maybe I should get back..." Carol nodded again, but her mouth was set in a tight line as she looked towards her co-worker. With a half-hearted wave she started walking back. Carol gave her an unreadable glance back, but soon turned to the smaller male in ront of her. Placing a hand on his shoulder she led him to a chair and pulled it out for him. He sat with a nod, clearly too shaken to talk. She sat opposite him, trying to shake off someof the water clinging to her skin before she did. Zim quietly pulled off his hood, exposing the robot clinging to him for dear life. He picked him up under the armpits and pulled him down, opening the front of his jacket for him. Gir crawled inside and curled up, Zim idily placing a protective hand over him. Then, with a gulp, he looked towards Carol again.

_Splashes._

_Sigh._

_'Zim...'_


	27. Pinkeye

"Zim, you can't let her get to you," stated Carol. "She doesn't know what she's getting at, she's just suspicious. Besides, it's not like she'd know what it's like for you," she added angrily. "Don't listen to her." 

"But she's right!" he burst out. He didn't want Carol's friendship to fall apart because of him. Keeping up his facade had finally worn him out. He wanted the truth known.

"Zim, listen to me," she said, looking into his eyes and placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "You can't let her get to you. You didn't mean for that to happen to Dib, and I know it. Now-"

"No!" he interrupted. "That's not it! What she said about me being an alien..."

"Look," Carol said, deathly serious, "What she said was stupid. You may feel like that sometimes because of your condition, but it's not true. You can't let ignorant people like her-"

"You're not listening!" he shouted, clearly agitated. "Look at this!" He pulled down the sleeve of his coat and shirt, exposing the place where her wet hand had been. There was a perfect outline of four fingers impressed there, the sore hurting him when exposed to the moist air. "Look," he repeated, "the rain burns me."

Carol stared blankly at the darkened streaks on his wrist. She was silent for a moment, as if trying to take it in. "So... so you have sensative skin because of your condition," she said finally. "So what? The rain gets more polluted every year."

Zims mouth fell open at this. "N- no! You're not getting it!" he shrieked, jumping to his feet. Moving his burnt hand up to his face, he began to pull at egde of his contacts. It must have looked like he was trying to gouge his own eyes out to her, because she gasped aloud and tried to reach across the table to stop him. However, he put up a hand to signal her to wait. He was determined to prove what he was to her. Even though he knew it could be the end of him, he doubted it, he was fairly sure Carol wouldn't turn him in. Slowly and carefully, he peeled back the flexible plastic material and exposed a bright red eye.

She froze in shock. A series of unintelligable noises came from her throat and her mouth hung open, lip quivering. Standing in alarm, but keeping both hands firmly on the table in front of them, she stared at him, eyes wideneing more with each second. She soon fell silent, letting the rain be the only noise between the two. Her mouth still hung open as she moved up one hand, almost as if to touch his face and make sure he was real. She began to shake, then quickly pulled her hand back and snapped her jaw shut. Zim only kept his eyes on her, unblinking.

She swallowed, steadied her self and gave a forced smile. "P- pink eye gets spread around easily t-this time of year," she said, sounding very forced. She was still slightly shaking, and looked very ill-at-ease.

Zim's jaw dropped. Could she really be that stupid? Proof right in front of their noses and the humans still didn't believe! Part of him wanted to shout at her, "Look! Look! Can't you see?! How can you be so willingly blind?!" but it was already painfully clear that she couldn't handle the truth. She was already visibly shaken from him trying to force the knowledge on her. He sat with a sigh, and slowly placed the contact back in his eye. "Yes," he said aloud, "I suppose you're right. She's just messing with my head."

Carol looked very relived, whether it was because she had finally 'gotten through to him' or because the cherry eye was no longer staring her down, making her uneasy, it wasn''t apparent. "Don't worry about her," she comforted, the last of the shakes leaving her. Zim sighed. "Where were you planning on going, anyway?" she asked.

"The hospital," he answered. A clash of thunder reminded him that he still had a frightened Gir to take care of.

"Well, what do you say we walk there together? You still didn't tell me what was wrong," she pointed out.

Zim's face fell. "I suppose", he mumbled. Looking up he thought to the boy who couldnt hear him, _'I think I finally understand your frustration, Dib.'_

_Steps._

_Splashes._

_Sigh._

* * *

_A/N: I just have to take a little time to thank everyone who's read, everyone who's reviewed (Over 200 Reviews! That number still stuns me), and everyone who's favorited or watched it. You guys really have no idea how much that means to me. However, regrettably, I think I will be taking a break from this here story. I have other things to work on (Like updating Promise more than once amonth... grumblebrumble) and maybe some things to start, so for now, Things We Took for Granted will be put on Haitus. I'll still be trying to update my other stories (which have been badly neglected) and Being active on DeviantArt (theres a link in my profle), so it's not like I'm dead or anything! However, while we're on the subject of DeviantArt, a certain someone is contemplating making a Doujinshii of TWTFG! Why dont you all go and encourage him, hm? -wink wink- He risdes at http:// the smallest invader . deviant art . com, spaces removed of course. At the very least look in his scraps, he's got some fanart stashed there. Be sure to check out my other stories, and don't worry, I will return! I promise you that. Peace out, and lots of Love - Dae, A.K.A. StardustSage  
_


	28. Gazzums

He told her what had happened. Dib was paralyzed. She took the news as well as could be expected, and told him that she hoped things would get better soon. "After all," she said, with her tender smile partially obscured by the rain, "once you hit bottom the only way to go is up, right?" He turned and gave a smile chuckle. With a fake accompanying laugh, Zim half-heartedly joked, "Well I suppose I _have_ hit bottom." Turning away he let out a sigh under his hood, and idily reached up and petted Gir. 

When they finally arrived at the hospital the wind had started up again, all attempts at conversation drowned out by the pouring all around them. Once it was in sight Zim made a dash for it, followed not too far behind by Carol. Safely inside, he held the door open for her as a crash of lightning sounded. She nearly lost her balance as she scurried in, stumbling in her heels over the threshhold. Panting lightly and supporting herself with one hand on the wall, she looked around the waiting room.

"It's... kinda creepy in here," she noted.

"Tell me about it." The alien shrugged and rolled his eyes. She stood strait again and, Zim by her side, walked to the counter. After a quick conversation with the nurse, they were allowed back down the hall.

Upon entering Dib's room, Zim was greeted with a familiar voice. "Zim? Who''s this?" Gaz asked. The radio was on, barely audible, but the beat could still be heard above the hum of the machines.

"Gaz! What're you doing here?" he inquired, pleasantly surprised. Then he felt something under his jacket begin to squirm.

"GAZZUMS!" Gir shouted, leaping out of his masters raincoat and tackle-hugging Gaz so hard that she nearly fell down.

"G- Gir! Get off," she commanded, although she didn't sound too upset. The green dog simply cuddled her and cooed happily. "Gir..." she whined quietly, a light blush creeping onto her cheeks. No one ever managed to embarrass her now except that little android.

Zim chuckled to himself as he pulled the raincoat over his head and draped it on the chair. "So," he said, turning to Gaz, who was quietly trying to pry the robot off, "How come you aren't in school?"

"I should ask you the same thing," she replied flatly. With a few more grunts and useless tugs, she finally gave up on trying to get Gir to release his grip, and instead hugged him back to support him and make herself more comfortable. He made a happy little noise at this and Gaz's cheeks turning a light pink.

"Well, it's kind of a long story, you see..." he mumbled.

"Speaking of long stories," Carol interuppted, "who is she?" She nodded towards Gaz.

The quietly intense answer came, "I'm Dib's sister."

"Oh, I'm sorry," she apologized immediately. "Zim's told me some things about you. You seem like a nice person." This gained Zim an angry glare from Gaz.

"Oh? What sort of things?" She cocked a brow. "And how exactly do you know Zim? I don't think he's ever mentioned you." Gaz was obviously unsure about this new girl, and was radiating icy indeifference. Carol almost seemed taken aback by it, and placed her hands firmly on her hips, ready to retort.

Just then Zim decided to step in before the pair got into a cat fight. "How about I explain things, hm?" Both girls gave him a look, but then nodded quietly, not quite taking thier eyes off the other.

After explaining his meeting of Carol at the Coffee shop, leaving Tiff out of the story, Gaz seemed to accept her. "Glad to see someone cares," smiled Gaz. At least, as close to a smile as Gaz could get around someone she didn't know. The muave haired girl extended a hand. Carol smiled warmly back and shook it.

"Glad to have met you," she replied. Zim watched the two in silence, grinning and once again catching himself enjoying other being's happiness. In the background a soft techno song played, although he couldn't quite hear the lyrics.

_Beep-beep._

_Tap tap._

_Pitter-patter._

_

* * *

_ _A/N: Guess who's back?  
Well, the new chapter is here and TWTFG is officially off Haitus! Now because of school and other issues, it'll be on a new, once a week schedual, but I'll try to make the chapters longer to help with that. ALSO! A _huge _thanks for almost 250 reviews and over **20,000** hits!  
__I love you all, I hope you enjoy the chapter! Ciao for now!_


	29. Take My Umbrella

"So I guess you're here to see Dib then?" Gaz asked, tapping her foot lightly to the music. 

"Um, yeah. That's okay, right?" she inquired nervously.

Gaz almost chuckled at how worried the girl was. "Yeah, of course. He's right there."

She pointed to the pale boy wrapped almost all covered in bandages with an IV and several machines hooked up to him. Carol nearly gasped when she saw him, eyes widening. The rain lightly pattering against the window when the wind blew was the perfect soundtrack. He looked to sickly and helpless, it nearly broke her heart. Zim and Gaz took the chance to look him over at the same time. For them the ache was worse. They had known him before, they had seen him in his prime and watched him running around, almost care-free. Now his hair was greasy and beginning to get ruffled. He was a moonlight white and the little exposed skin he had was almost waxy. The bandages were mostly clean and the machines all around him were emmitting a low buzz and a rythmic beeping to assure them that he was still alive. However, the worst part was his deathly stillness. It was unnatural for anyone to be that still, but for energetic Dib, it was nearly unbearable. The image would never be easy to see.

Finally managing to tear her eyes away, she turned to Zim. "My God. I had no idea." Her hand was held up to her mouth in a concerned manner, and Zim merely gave a weak shrug.

"He'll get better. He has to."

"A- are you sure?" she asked again anxiously. Both Gaz and Zim gave her a serious stare and nodded. There was no other option to them. Dib had to survive. They needed him to. Even thinking otherwise just hurt too much to bear. The song in the background changed, though still hard to hear when intermingled with the rain.

"It's good that he has friends like you," she said. Her thoughts turned to Tiff and she looked away sadly for a bit, before looking back at Dib's pale, unmoving face with a ball of guilt in her stomach. She mentally scolded herself for being upset when others had much worse problems, but neither of them caught the scowl that flashed on her face. Biting her lip she looked him up and down, then turned to Zim.

"You know..." she mumbled sullenly, fiddling with her fingers, "I think I had better get back to the coffee shop before the storm gets worse."

Zim blinked, regarding her curiously and inquiring, "You sure? It's a long walk, I don't want-"

"I'm fine." she immediately replied. The last thing she wanted to do was cause Zim more worry. "I'm sorry I couldn't stay longer."

Zim was almost taken aback by her quick response. "But what about...?" He didn't want to have to explin the whole situation to Gaz, it was easier not to and he didn't want to burden her.

"It's fine," she said, lieing through her teeth. Tiff had been her best friend since middle school. How could she suddenly act so irrationally? She huffed softly and started out the door. "Nice to meet you, Gaz," she added, turning back for a moment before walking out.

As she was about to walk back out into the storm she a "Wait a minute," come from behind her.

"Hm? She turned to face the two behind her.

Holding out a black bundle of slick and slightly wet cloth, Gaz said, "Here, take my umbrella. I can always get a ride."

Carol smiled, genuinely touched. "Thank you," she said, taking it. As she opened the door and stepped out she opened it, looking out into the dark, dreary rainfall. It looked like nothing but stormclouds for her from then on out. And it was a pretty long walk from here to the shop. Catching a bus sounded like a pretty good option, but she unfortunately only had her uniform, and she had no money in that. Walking out and holding the umbrella steady against the wind she sighed to herself.

_Splashes._

_Honk._

_Gasp._


	30. I Need You

"Tiff?!" she gasped. Carol nearly dropped the umbrella at seeing her co-worker pull up in front of her in her beat up old car. "What are you doing here?" Hope that she would apologize flittered through her voice, and she was happy to see her friend in spite of herself. Tiff turned off the engine and got out without any hesitation, walking up to her friend quickly and standing in front of her, eyes staring at the ground as rain soaked her uniform again. 

"Tiff," she smiled sweetly, bending slightly to try and get closer to her friend. She took one step in to shelter her from the rain, which finally prompted the blonde to lift her chin and open her pleading eyes. "Tiff, what are you doing here?" she repeated.

With a quivering lip, Tiff answered by squeezing her eyes shut and moving in close. She wrapped her arms around her friend and buried her face in the crook of her neck, long sleek ponytail falling off to the side.

Carols mouth hung open as Tiff embraced her needily. It soon closed into a smile, though. She could never stay mad for long, especially not at Tiff. She simply wrapped her arms around her friend without a word, sighing happily as the rain fell all around them but they stayed dry.

Inside, Gaz and Zim both stared out. For Gaz, it was confusion that made her ask, "Who's that?" but Zim was another kind of confused. He wanted to rush out and make sure that really was who he thought it was, but his raincoat was still in Dib's room and it was a good distance in the rain to the two girls. He didn't dare risk burning his skin, especially not in front of the blond who had begun sobing in Carols arms.

"Please..." she begged between worn breaths, "I need you..."

A few hiccups left her before Carol responded, "It's okay, I... It's okay," She stepped slowly down to the car, walking Tiff with her. With a weak wave back Carol stepped into the drivers seat, motioning for her friend to come around. Only a quick glance was spared Zim's way as she got in. It wasn't angy are accusing, it was more uncertain. As they drove away Zim stared in wonder at how lucky she had been to get a second chance from Carol. Most people wouldn't have done that. Zim had to ask himself if he would even be able to forgive her. It quickly faded though, he couldn't blame the human for her anger, she was simply misguided. Besides, she had been right on at least one thing. He would have to forgive her.

With his mind spinning like that he nearly missed Gaz's question. Looking up from the splatters of rain on the ground he gave her a questioning 'huh?' "I said, who was that?" Gaz repeated. Zim looked away. "Another long story?" she asked, slight smirk in her smile. "Well, tell me inside, okay? It's getting cold out here." Zim quickly agreed, rubbing his arms up and down and stepping back inside, watching as the wind whipped the trees and dotted the glass with raindrops.

As he stared out he couldn't help but ask himself more about forgiveness. Would Dib forgive him when he woke up? Would he be angry? Depressed? Would he be needy and want someone to be with him or would he want to be alone? Could Zim ever forgive himself for what had happened? Could he forgive himself for all the things he had done over the three years? What would things be like after this? What did 'this' even mean anymore? Wishing on every covered star in the sky, Zim wanted nothing more than for Dib to allow him to be near him once he woke up. That was all he could wish for- he could hope for affection, or the returning of his feelings, but what he could expect... well, he hoped it would be a soft acceptance, simply allowing him to be there so he could care fro a distance.

The snaps of fingers sounded in his face. Gaz was trying to get his attention with calls of, "Hey Zim, come on!" He gave a start and turned to the muave haired girl behind him. "Lets sit in Dib's room, huh?" she said softly. Zim nodded, seeming as though he had temporarily lost his voice. As they entered the room again and the Irken gazed on the wan face of his former enemy, another wave of remorse quivered up his spine, followed by another bout of self-conscious worry. He was not supposed to feel this way, and he knew it. Things weren't supposed to be like this, and yet they were. And as wrong as it was, he realized that his feelings were not out of the blue- the only person who had given him any real contact or attention was Dib. And he realized that he needed the boy, just like Tiff needed Carol for some reason. And as he noticed Gaz lay a hand on his shoulder, unnerved by how quiet he was, he gave a tiny smile. He closed his eyes and listened to the beating of the boys heart, wondering why it had taken three years to realize all of this. He even dared to ask Gaz if she could venture a guess.

Clearly relived to know what Zim was thinking about she answered, "Well, when something happend suddenly it forces you to think about yourself, it forces you to take a look at everything. It's like dropping a frog in hot water or putting a frog in normal water and slowly turning it up. The first frog will jump, the sencond will stay even if it kills him."

It ttok a minute for him to soak that in. "Thank you..." he whispered. The dial on the radio had managed to get bumped, by a nurse probably, and was now playing nothing but whitte noise.

_Static._

_Pattering._

_Pouring._


	31. Three Weeks

_A/N: I missed M W F too much, so here I am again. TT I'm a workaholic I guess. Oh well, enjoy!_

* * *

Adjusting over the next three weeks to the new regiment of going in to the hospital and the coffee shop every day was the hardest. Dib didn't stir at all, and it was nearly killing Zim. Carol and Tiff apparently patching things up without too much difficulty, although once in a while Zim caught Tiff staring at Carol in an odd way. He simply brushed it off, but was curious as to what she could be thinking. Her apology had been short, quiet and reserved, and Zim knew it was mostly for Carols sake that she said it, but he was still thankful. Contemplating whether or not to tell her the truth had been a kind distraction from his worry about Dib. 

Once again he sat staring at the figure in the bed, fresh bandages on his wounds, and some healed enough where they weren't needed. A few stitches had been applied to Dib's forehead, overlapping his eyebrow. But Zim was happy- the bandage that partially obscured his face was gone, and now he could see more of his beautiful fallen angel's face. He had taken to calling him that, because to him it seemed a fitting name. Gaz would sometimes call him from skool when things were getting hard for her and used that codename so that the other children wouldn't harrass her. She had to call him only because he hadn't gone since the day he screamed out in Dib's defense.

Gonig to skool just seemed wrong to him. There were too many memories of things he and Dib had done, too many fights he regretted, and too many children all too happy to have 'the crazy boy' gone. Zim simply couldn't take it. Despite the fact that the skool called almost every day to inquire about his whereabouts, he maintained that he was very sick and wouldn't be coming in for a long while. Besides, he was too busy thinking of a way to help the boy and pondering over his new feelings.

Zim frowned and gently lifted the bandaged arm again. Where skin touched sheets it was discolored and looked sore. It was lesions from staying in the same position so long, and Zim knew that if they contniued they would greatly harm him. He had tried to think of a way to combat them, and was in fact working on a nanobot formula that would repair his cells. However this idea touched off others, and now he was working for a few hours every night on a cure for Dib's paralysis. He would only get so far before he would get tired, and he knew better than to try to work on something so delicate while fatigued.

Zim shivered. A cool chill had settled in the air- it was early November, and the leaves were all a beautiful golden color, with a swirl of reds and browns mixed in. As they flew past the open window the pushed more cold air in, causing Zim to lightly hugs his arms to his chest and cross his legs, thankful for his long wig and the curls of hair startnig to grow underneath it. Hopefully it would be a bit more thick before the dead of winter. He lifted his wig gently and stroked it with his gloved fingers. The texture was wonderfully soft, and it reminded him of Dib's almost, when it was clean. On a whim he reached over to touch the boy's hair. Yes, it was silky smooth today, the nurses washed it earlier. He had noticed it on the moniter in his living room as he walked out to go to the coffee shop. He sighed and let his eyes fall shut, stroking the boy's stray lock, finding comfort in the familiar feature, and the sound of the white noise in the background. The songs on the radio never seemed to match his mood anymore.

_Swish._

_Rustle._

_Static._


	32. Late Night Experiments

Hunched over a moniter, he clacked away at the keys, ignoring the grinding of machinery and the whirring of processors as he typed out instructions. Swiveling over to his right he played with a few buttons and adjusted a few knobs, fine tuning his formula. With another set of 'clackety clack's, he stood and moved over to a huge machine, with a set of airtight gloves extending into a sealed off room, so that a chemical could be manipulated without outside interference. He slipped his threee fingered hand inside, manipulating the mixture inside, adding droplets of another pale liquid. Sweat dripped off of his noseless face as he worked in the hot lab, equipment buzzing tiredly from being worked for countless hours. 

After a while, he was satisfied with his concotion, and slid his hands out, tapping on another keyboard. With a few sliwft strokes and the press of a button, a spindely metal claw extended with a vial of the light blue substance, which was carfeully grabbed by waiting hands. He ceremoniously carried it over to a waiting specimen, a plant, and holding the miztue in one hand, he made a tear in the leaf of the flower. He made sure it was a decent sized rip, but not enough to kill the tester, and then took a dropper from a tray beside him. Taking a few milllileters of water, he moved it over the tear. Holding his breath in anticipation, he squeezed, letting three transluscent drops fall over the minor injury. He waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Zim finally released his breath after a full minute passed, sullenly realizing that nothing was happening. With a depressed sigh, he placed the test tube in a rack and laid his head on an empty space on the counter. It finally occured to him that it must be late, and he checked his internal clock. The time was half past four. He groaned. He had stayed up almost all night trying to work on a cure for the boy, and he had still gotten nowhere. With a sigh he stood up and shuffled into the elevator. Terrible elevator music was doing nothing for his quickly souring mood, and he got an urge to ask his computer to change it, which he soon discarded, seeing as he had disabled the computer's Regulated Emotions Drive and disabled the command system in the process. He was now forced to do almost everything manually, which he really didn't mind. It had taught him the value of hard work, which was no small miracle.

Eventually he hit the ground floor and stumbled to his room, comforted by the cardiogram audible over the sound of the TV in the living room. Flopping onto his bed with a subtle 'oof', he crawled under the covers, but not before carefully taking off his Pak. He had decided to try living for short amounts of time without it, and found that once he took it off it was like seeing the world through another pair of eyes. He had gotten used to sitting in bed without it for a few minutes to calm himself down. His life clock ticked slowly, very slowly, so that he could live almost half an hour without it. He was gently training his body to live without the extra help. Sitting against the headrest he slipped off his shoes and gloves, and finally his shirt, pulling on a loose baggy green top, sporting a subtle 'Z?'. As he meditated he let his eyes fall shut, tapping his fingers against each other.

After about fifteen minutes he pulled his vital Irken piece on, allowing it a minute to snap back into the connectors in his spine. Exhaustion taking him over again, he buried his head in the green and pink pillows, wrapping the blanket around himself. He prayed for dreams that would not wake him in a cold sweat, although he had only had a few of those, and they had all been on bad days, triggered by stress. The fluffy down quilt encircling him would hopefully help, as well as the dream catcher Gir had bought him on a whim. The little minion and his purple floating companion had continued to make Dib cards every few days, as well. Zim had never fully realized how much they loved life until now.

He turned in the bed, having trouble calm himself. The day had been nothing too special, Dib's heart moniter had fluxuated for a bit in the hospital, but there was no twitter of movement. Cold October air seeped in through the walls, making Zim cling to the blanket. Nothing exciting had happened at the coffee shop either... so why was he still awake?

Zim sat up, rubbing his temples. He had forgotten to say goodnight. "How could I forget?" he mumbled to himself, swinging his feet over the edge of the bed. He walked to the living room and to the screen where his fallen angel slept. "Good night, Dib. Sweet dreams, I hope they're of a better tomorrow."

_Beep._

_Beep._

_Smile._


	33. Sleepy

Green eyelids fluttered against golden rays of sun, tiny eyelashes barely catching the light as the Irken came out of his sleepy haze. He sat up dreamily, rubbing his eyes and noticing that he brushed his wig instead of the fine baby-hairs he was growing. "Must have forgotten to take it off..." he mumbled to himself, pulling the covers off and shivering as he was exposed the cold morning air. Sleepily stumbling to the kitchen, but not before pulling his wig off and stretching his cramped antenna, he picked up a muffin he knew was baked especially for him by his faithful servants. It was sweet and delicious, tasting like blueberries and powdered sugar. 

"Hi-ya master!" shouted Gir, noting his masters wince at the sudden loud noise and sheepishly laughing.

After a moment to regain his composure, severely startled by the sudden shriek, Zim responded in a business like tone, "Good morning Gir."

"So what's in the blue today? Is it carrots?!"

Zim knew what he meant. "Nothing's up today, and the experiments have gotten me nowhere." He frustratedly raked his claws through his wispy locks. "I'm at wits end, I thought for sure that would work..."

Gir cooed, suddenly wrapping around his leg. "You need a break master! Let's go do something! Can I go see those girls agiain, they were nice!" With a quick nuzzle to the rumpled black fabric of his pants he looked up, huge begging eyes staring at his master. Zim frowned, trying to prevent himself from caving to the adorable little minion. It was futile, however, as soon he crouched down and petted the mop of fake green fur.

"Of course we can. Get your leash," he smiled.

A jubilant shriek rose up as the andriod skuttled off, leaving Zim to munch on the remainder of his muffin. Gir soon returned, gleefully jumping up and down as his master 'clink'ed it securely onto his collar. Shuffling out slowly, still in a somewhat sleepy daze, he ran into a wall of solid black and purple.

"Now don't tell me you were going out like that," smirked Gaz, arms crossed and looking down at the Irken, who had fallen down and was now rubbing his backside sorely.

"Oh, Gaz," he said, a bit surprised, "What are you doing here? Don't you have skool?"

"Hello, Earth to Zim? Saturday?" She offered a hand to help him up, which he gratefully took, smiling sheepishly. "And you didn't answer my question. What are doing walking around in your pajamas?"

Zim looked down, suddenly realizing that he hadn't changed. "Uh... oh. Um, yes, I was... I was just... going to a comfy cozy... uh... coffee shop party," he lied. Although if you wanted to get technical, he was going to a coffee shop. And with Gir a party was likely to follow no matter what, so... there. It was half true, at least. He smirked to himself.

"Mhm, right. Well." She looked him up and down with a critical eye, igrnoring how Gir was nudging at her leg and whining. "How 'bout you go change and I'll stay out here with Gir, and then we can go to this comfy cozy party _together_?"

"Um, yes. Good idea, glad I thought of it," he muttered. Gaz scowled slightly, knowing that something was wrong with Zim by the way he acted. He only acted like his old self when he didn't know what else to do, and she was well aware of it. Being really out of it didn't help him under her scrutinization either. She watched the back of his head as he shuffled back in, only finally noticing the tiny robot pastering her for attention when he left.

"Hey Gir," she smiled, scratching behind his ears. Cooing happily and wagging his tail, he leaned into her affections, needily rubbing against her hand.

_Rustle._

_Ruffle._

_Coo._


	34. Dont you?

_A/N: Somewhere Out There belongs to Our Lady Peace, and I hold no affiliations. And while we're on that subject, Invader Zim. Yeah, I don't own it. If I did, would I be writing fanfiction? xD_

* * *

Zim stepped out in his usual pink choker, looking subdued as he walked up to the two playing on his front lawn. "Alright, I'm ready," he mumbled, tiredly rubbing his eye.

Gaz stood to her full height and stared at his critically. "Zim, did you stay up all night trying to find a cure? 'Cause if you did I swear-"

"I did no such thing," he reassured her, holding up a hand to stop her threats. She eyed him again, then nodded.

"Good. 'Cause the last thing I need is an emotionallly confused iand/i sleep deprived Irken," she joked, ribbing him.

He winced and looked away, giving a half hearted laugh. "Haha, yeah..."

"So then, are we going or what?" she asked.

"Of course, Dib-sister," he replied, almost curlty.

She paused. That was the first time he had called her Dib-sister in... she couldn't remeber how long. "Are you sure you're okay Zim?" she asked again, lifting one eyebrow.

"Yes," he snapped back testily, turning and giving her a glare before he picked up Gir's leash. The little android looked bewteen them with wide eyes, wimpering. "What is it?" he asked harshly, although not making it clear if he was adressing the wimpering puppy or the girl staring him down with a flat look and one hand on her hip.

"You did stay up all night, didn't you?" she asked. Zim looked away from her general direction, suddenly ashamed for being so brash and yet at the same time still a bit angry. He wasn't sure why he felt the latter, but he was too tired to try to understand the pulsating emotions filling his chest.

"So what if I did?" he asked, refusing to look her way.

She scoffed, rolled her eyes, and approached him. He made no move to walk away, as some part of him still knew that he needed her, and instead looked down and shuffled his feet. Bending down, she scooped up Gir and stroked under his chin, smiling at the cooing noises he made. With a gentle tug to Gir's leash, she coaxed Zim to face her, although he wouldn't look into her eyes. "Hey, c'mon," she urged. Gulping sheepishly, he finally dared to meet her gaze. "Look, I want him to wake up as much as you do, but you can't kill yourself over it. That's bad for you, and as much as it hurts I don't want you hurting yourself to try and make him better."

Something in Zim felt as through it had been stung, and throbbed with pain. Not physical pain, but something... deeper. "But don't you want him back?!" he cried, distraught.

Slightly taken aback by ther sudden shout, and the worn, pained look that accompanied it, Gaz's eyes widened. Gir clung to her like a frightened child. "Zim, I know you're scared, but-"

"You don't know anything!" he screamed, becoming hysterical.

"Zim!" she snapped. He looked into her eyes, his false contacts filled with panic. "Zim, calm down, really, I want him back as much as you do." She sighed sadly and dropped her gaze, a quiet release, and continued, heart aching, "I miss him so much, I can't believe all the time I wasted and all the things I've done to him. I want him back as much as you do." Suddenly her eyes snapped up, intense and bright. "But you can't let that make you do crazy things! You have to get a hold of yourself, Zim."

Zim only wimpered a quiet reply. "B- but I..."

"You're as obsessed with him as he is with you. Just not in the same way as he was."

He nodded, looking down. "Do you think..." he started out a question, but trailed off, not really sure he wanted to continue, or even hear the answer. "You're right," he admitted.

"Good," she said, still petting Gir. "Now how about that coffee, huh?"

Zim stayed silent for a bit. "How about... you get it. I want to go to the hospital."

Gaz nodded understandingly. "I'll bring you some coffee then."

Zim looked at her and smiled, requesting, "And could you take Gir with you? I think he wants to see Carol and Tiff, and you know he loves walking with you."

Gaz blushed slightly at this. "Sure," she grinned, although she still couldn't quite smile without looking smug. "C'mon Gir," she adressed the robot, "let's go get coffee, huh?" He squealed and jumped up, wrapping his arms around her shoulders and nuzzling his furry cheek against her neck. Flushing lightly again, she looked up to see Zim smirking at her. "S- stop it," she said reluctantly, feeling how hot her face was. She plucked him off of her front and set him on the ground, taking his leash and begging to walk.

Zim watched them go and smiled lightly to himself. He was a bit glad that he would have the walk to himself to set his thoughts strait before he got to see Dib again. A small part of him thought about pulling out his metallic legs from his Pak to help him get to the hospital quicker, but he dismissed the thought as he had done before. He felt too Irken when he used the tools stored in his Pak. It seemed unnatural to him now.

Setting off on foot, he couldn't help but hum a tune to himself, watching the gloden leaves fall against the grey sky, reminding him vaugely of the rainy nights he had spent with his nightmares. He began to sing. It came lightly spinning from his green lips, wind carrying it softly away in a puff of visible breath.

_"You're falling out of reach, defying gravity,  
__I know you're out there, somewhere out there..."_


	35. Hear You Me

_A/N: Hear You Me is by Jimmy Eat World, and normally I'd apologize for the extreme lateness, explaining that I was busy like crazy and yadda yadda yadda, but I think the chapter will make up for it... maybe? -grins sheepishly-_

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He arrived at the hospital more quickly than he realized, carried by his thoughts most of the way. A slight chill was still in the air, causing him to shiver and cross his arms across his chest. Soon it would be sweater weather, and he then it would begin to snow. He smiled fondly, remembering the huge snowball fights he and Dib would have in front of the school. Walking in without a second thought, he quickly made his way to Dib's room. The nurses had gradually gotten used to him staying there everyday, so he was allowed in without a second thought. The radio was playing a soft tune, backed by a bass wallowing in low notes as a voice crooned softly. 

_There's no one in town I know You gave us some place to go.  
I never said thank you for that.  
I thought I might get one more chance_.

Zim sat cross legged in the chair, watching Dib as he rested unmoving in the bed across from him. He never did realize before how much Dib gave to him. He gave him a reason to belive in something bigger, a chance to experience feelings for the first time, and even before that, a goal, a reason to exsist. The boy didn't even know all he had done for Zim, how could he have? The change had been so slow for the first three years that even a sharp mind like Dib couldn't have noticed the full extent of the changes.

And Zim realized all at once that he had never said thank you for that.

_What would you think of me now,  
so lucky, so strong, so proud?  
I never said thank you for that,  
now I'll never have a chance._

He had always taken for granted that Dib would be there, that maybe one day he would be able to swallow his pride and thank the boy like his human side always told him to. But what would Dib think now, now that he had fully broken free of his Irken shell, and was allowing himself to feel for the first time. What would he think of his grief, his regret, his love?

It hit Zim that he may never know.

No matter how much he begged the powers that be, and no matter how long he worked on a cure, there was still no garuntee that anything would come of it. Humans dies from things like this all the time, they were so fragile, emotionally and physically. Zim was learning the former the hard way.

_May angels lead you in.  
Hear you me my friends.  
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.  
May angels lead you in_.

Zim folded his hands and bowed his head. He had seen the other humans do it, and although he didn't realy know what exactly he was praying to, nor did he care, he still prayed to the sky that things would turn out okay. Relying on luck went against everything he was taught, but it couldn't hurt anything, he figured. Dib needed all the luck he could muster, at the moment.

"Dib please... come back..." He heard the plea escape his lips for what seemed like the thousandth time. He stood and walked over to the boy, tears forming in his eyes. He didn't know why he was getting so choked up from a simple song, but he needed to feel close to someone. "Dib, please..." Brushing a few stray locks of hair from his forehead, he laid a gentle kiss there. "Come back."

_What would you think of me now,  
so lucky, so strong, so proud?  
I never said thank you for that,  
now I'll never have a chance._

Once again unstirring from his sleep, Dib stayed perfectly still. "Dib, please..." he begged uselessly, placing a hand on the boys shoulder. Tears welled at the corners of his eyes. "Please..." Begging for anything seemed so strange, but he couldn't stop himself as he lightly shook the boy. "Please wake up, Dib..."

His tears brimming, he shook the boy again, feeling his knees go weak, "Please, wake up so I can thank you for the things we took for granted..."

_May angels lead you in.  
Hear you me my friends.  
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.  
May angels lead you in._

A single tear penetrated the darkness of Dib's endless dream, a feeling of substance, warm and wet against his cheek. He frowned, unused to the feeling of something on him. The brightness faded, and he felt himself sinking slowly, away from the floating surrealism of emptiness. He slowly saw light blurr into reality, and a familiar green shape hovering over him. "Z- Zim?" he rasped, the world slowly coming into focus again as he opened his eyes. This time it felt real, not as though everything was a staged reality, as if he were finally waking. "Zim...?" he rasped again. Something felt off, and he knew it, even as he saw Zim above him, gasp and stare, wide-eyed at him.

The bony figure beneath him fluttering his eyes, Zim gaped. "Z- Zim," he whispered, voice sounding disused and worn, "Why can't I feel...?" Tears continued flowing over and landing with soft drips on the boy's pale, bandages skin.

"Can't feel what?" he asked urgently.

Dib felt his eyes matching Zim's, welling up, but not yet spilling over. "A- almost everything..." he mumbled softly. Zim looked at him with mouth hanging open, tears flowing over. Then Dib abruptly realized what was wrong, and why he felt odd talking. "M- my lungs..."

Zim's eyes widened. Of course, Dib was on a ventilator, he couldn't breath for himself. "Did you steal them again...?" Dib quietly accused.

Zim balked. The boy thought he would... Dib didn't trust him not to... Choking down a sob, Zim placed gloved hands over his mouth, trying not to have a full-on breakdown. Dib, completely worn out, kept quiet as he observed Zim crying and staring at him with the most unusal expression on his face. He shut his eyes again, the brightness of the hospital being almost painful to look at.

Zim gasped. "Dib, no!" he cried, thinking the boy was slipping back into the sleep again. He jumped over to him and quickly massed their lips, causing Dib's eyes to open with a start. What in the hell did Zim think he was doing? Oh God... Kissing him on the lips... Mmm, it wasn't half bad... but wait, what?!

Zim pulled away to see if Dib was still with them, and wasn't sure weather to be happy or scared when he saw Dib staring up at him like he had just done something insane. And maybe he had, neither was quite sure of themselves at that point. Too exhasted to talk, Dib simply stared at him, stunned.

"N-nurse!" Zim suddenly turned around, ashamed, unable to face the boy's stare any longer. "Nurse! Please! Come here!" he called out the door.

_On sleepless roads the sleepless go.  
Beep-Beep.__  
May angels lead you in.  
Step-Step.  
May angels lead you in.  
Gasp._


	36. I Dont Believe It

In the insuing chaos, nurses came from all around to check vitals, call the Professor and his daughter, and some just to witness one of the rare hospital miracles. Dib hoarsely answered a few questions, just to make sure his memory was in tact, and it was just fine. Dib remembered the chase, and everything beforehand. All during this Zim just watched silently from the corner, not wanting to disturb the nurses and definately not wanting to disturb the boy. Pretty soon, Membrane, tall and foreboding in his huge white lab coat, and Gaz, seeming so unusually small and firghtened, rushed in and ran to Dib's bedside. 

"Dib?" Gaz asked tearfully, as though it couldn't be true. She was shivering from head to toe, clutching the edge of the bed.

"Gaz," he croaked, "what's going on?"

"A crash," Zim piped up from the corner.

"You crashed something into me? You dirty-" he wheezed, unable to continue. A nurse came to his aid, putting an oxygen mask over his face and forcing him to breath for a few seconds. He still had the breathing tube inserted into his neck, but he was using much more breath than he had before.

"No, a car crash, it was all an accident," replied Gaz for the alien, who was slumping over silently in the corner and staring at the scene with no tangible emotion, but biting his lip absentmindedly.

Dib glared at both of them for a moment, clearly wanting to say something or make a motion, but he lay in his bed helplessly with an oxygen mask held to his face. He had never felt so powerless in his life.

They both stared at him with the same imploring look. The professor decided to speak up. "I know it's a lot to take in, son, but please try to understand. We're all upset, and we all want to help you." The nurse finally removed the mask to allow him to reply.

"I don't belive it."

Zim flinched, the sting of the words almost physically painful. The professor turned away, furrowing his brows. Gaz simply stared.

Dib continued. "I don't believe any of it. Zim is in here, he should be partying with Gir and signaling the Armada."

"Now son," said Membrane, turning to face him, "no more of this alien thing, you-"

"No! You just-" tears filled Dib's eyes as his unfunctioning lungs gave him nothing and the nurse had to pull down the mask again.

"Maybe you all should leave for a while, he's obviously under a lot of stress and needs some time to himself," the nurse suggested softly. She pulled the mask off again to let Dib continue.

"You just listen, every time you've tried to 'help' me you've shipped me off to some asylum. I don't..." His tears threatened to spill over onto his cheeks. "I don't want any of your help..." he rasped finally. "Or yours," he added, giving a pointed glare in Zim's direction.

"Dib," Zim stopped leaning on the wall and stood, approaching the boy, "listen, it's hard to explain, but I've realized some things. I'm not the same Invader I was, I want-"

"You dont want anything but to kill me," he cut the Irken off. A few nurses raised an eyebrow at Zim but said nothing. "...Get them out," he whispered in his broken, worn voice.

As an apologetic nurse pushed the three out, Zim turned. "I've been at your bedside for three weeks!" he cried, "Don't you think I would have by now?!" His fists were clenched in what looked like anger, but his eyes were wet and he felt something in his chest tear, like someone had ripped him to shreds from the inside out. He couldn't bear to look at the boy anymore, and he quickly turned away to stop the tears from flowing in Dib's sight.

Gaz looked back and forth between the two, consumed in pain, and saw another nurse rest the oxygen mask on Dib's face as tears dribbled down his cheek. Everything was wrong, everything was gone. The world seemed just as broken as Dib's body and Zim's spirit, for he was crying to himself now, back turned from all of them, face buried in his knees. They had somehow made their way to the waiting room. Some were staring at them, but Gaz took no notice. Everything seemed to be rushing around her ears, the world turned to static. Her eyes felt hollow and her heart like lead in her chest, and she sank to her knees, blankly staring at a plain white wall. Empty, she felt more empty than she ever had, empty and hopeless. She cupped her hands over her ears to block out the sound of the waiting patients and clenched her eyes, trying to find herself in the quiet and dark.


	37. Only a Child

_A/N: I feel the need to mention that I AM SO SORRY FOR THE DELAY! (Bad author, bad!) However, to make up for it, I have two chapters for you now. I'm going to _try_ to make up for the lost time by updating over break, but no promises. Thanks for being so patient, guys! (And hate to say it but reviews will make me sooo much more motivated. So, ya know... go ahead and beg for more._ _o3o Thanks_ _again!)_

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Eventually, things cooled down. Zim wiped his eyes dry and Dib allowed them to come back in. Gaz was jilted off her axis, but managed. As soon as Zim entered the room he could feel the tensoin, but the nurses had left Dib's oxygen mask on, leaving him unable to speak. "Dib, don't try to talk right now, you're very weakened, and the last thing you need is more stress on your body," Zim commanded. Dib glared at him. 

"Now I know you blame me for this, but hear me out. I've been at your bedside every day for three weeks. Irkens are trained to kick when their enemy is down, to win no matter the cost. If you were right about me, you'd be dead."

Throwing a pleading look at Gaz, Dib's heart rate seemed to jump a little bit. With no hands to wipe his tears, his cheeks wre stained with the salty sadness. Gaz nodded her head at him and confirmed that yes, Zim was telling the truth, she had seen him.

"Dib."

Once again, a glower was thrown Zim's way.

"I don't expect you to trust me."

Dib rolled his eyes. He would have snorted if he was able.

"I just want you to let me be here."

Dib glared.

"Gaz can be with me the entire time, if you like."

His gaze got so sharp Zim thought his heart had been pierced.

"Please, Dib."

The boy looked away at this. Zim was begging him. He didn't dare entertain the thought that he was telling the truth, but seeing his options, it looked like he would have no choice but to trust the alien. He gave him a distrusting look that dissolved into dispair, and then let his eyes wander aimlessly to the cieling.

Zim looked away as well. He could never have imagined that just talking to the boy could be so painful. The sheer hate in his eyes, coupled with the sudden helplessness just tore Zim apart. He walked up to him again, resting his forehead on the cool, hollow feeling chest of the broken and bandaged boy. It earned him a stare, but when tears began to roll down his cheeks again, Dib didn't know what to think.

Maybe if Zim had been acting like himself, Dib would have managed better. Maybe if the alien had laughed, he could have stood up to him. Maybe if he hadn't given him that stupid kiss. The world just seemed like it had gone through the tumble cycle on high, and Dib couldn't find the off button.

Zim looked up at him, eyes swelled. "I can't ask you for anything," he said in a broken voice. "I can't even ask because I have no right." Dib wanted to move his hands, but to push him away or just hold him steady he didn't know. Zim was not supposed to be like this. He was not supposed to be like this.

Gaz, from the corner, just stood and watched. She couldn't bring herself to say anything. Years of selfishness had taught her not to care, but she never coul have dreamed this was how things would end up. They should have known better, they all should have no known better than to play dangerous games like these. Slipping out silently, she went in search of Membrane. She wasn't ready to accept this yet. She was only a child. Only eleven ears old.

She found him at the end of the hall, staring off into space with a forlorn look. Without a sound she walked up to her father and he embraced her, letting her bury her tired face in the fabric of his coat. There were no words anymore. The world rushed around them as they tried to center themselves.

_Steps._

_Chatter._

_Sob._


	38. Actions and Words

Zim sat up as the Professor entered again. Gaz followed him closely, and Dib glaced their way. Still unable to say a word through the oxygen mask, he blinked, waiting for his father to talk. As anticipated, Membrane began to make a speech. "Dib, I know this is a shock, but we're goig to get through it as a family. Your sister and I are _here_ for you. We're doing everything we can to reverse the condition, but you must realize what a new field of research regenerative medicine is." He placed a strong hand on Dib's unfeeling shoulder. "Our team is going to be work endlessly to find this Dib. Don't give up." 

Under his breath so quiet that no human could have heard him, Zim murmured "Hypocrite."

Dib blinked, not knowing quite what he was getting at. "I knew you'd understand, son," Membrane said, proud. "I won't be back until I find a cure! A cure... with REAL SCIENCE!" Outside, a few of the nurses swooned. With a cough, the Professor moved swiftly to the door and stepped out.

Gaz and Zim glanced Dib's way. His eyes held a blank look, but then they narrowed in familiar bitterness. They both sighed, and Gaz stepped forward. "Dib, I know dad's not... the most affectionate, but he means well. He just wants you to get better. We all do."

This set the boy off and he glared dangerously in her dirction. Zim could see his adams apple bobbing, and taking it as a sign that the boy wanted to speak, he pulled the mask off. "Careful..." he mumbled, staring at the fragile boy.

"You think I'm just... a broken toy?" Dib hissed harshly at his sister. She actually flinched, something that the invincible Gaz never thought she'd do. "Tape him up or he's... useless?" he whispered.

Shocked, Gaz shook her head. "That's not it at all! We wan't you to be your old self again." Zim looked down. "We want you to be independant."

Dib glared at them both, lip trembling. "You... just..." Once again he shut his eyes and wished that this was all a dream. It had to be, didn't it? He was the defender of Earth: strong, brave, invincible! This couldn't have happened to him. "You don't care," he hissed at them both.

"Don't be stupid!" Gaz snapped, tears in her eyes. Old habits die hard. "Don't you see we care? Why else would we be here?!" He shot her a look that said 'You tell me.'

Zim had begun to quiver. "There's just nothing we can say, is there? Nothing than can prove our good intentions?"

"Actions... louder than words..." Dib shut his eyes and clenched his jaw weakly, though it took much effort. He would say no more.

A nurse in the corner cleared her throat meekly. "Um, I think it's best he get some rest now... No more visiting today, alright? The doctors will need to do tests."

From the outside looking in, the proffessor was glad for his goggles and high collar. They hid the guilty tears streaking down his cheeks. He turned away and walked down the hall as fast as his boots would take him. Behind him, a pair of somber voices sorted through themselves as the glass door on Dib's room slid open. He clomped on, needing to get somewhere, anywhere but here.

_Shut._

_Steps._

_Sigh._


	39. A Few Thoughts

"I'm going back to my base." 

Gaz nodded and accepted this. She had no idea what she would do with the rest of her day- she couldn't bring herself to go back to school. "Maybe I'll go home too." But she shuddered at all the memories she would find there- memories that she would rather were forgotten. Regret was threatening to swallow her whole. She never thought she would have to see Dib so defenseless. For once she couldn't call him a whiner. "Maybe not."

Zim nodded and bid her goodbye. For the first time in a while, he marched a bit when he walked. All in all it was good news, wasn't it? Dib was getting better. And really he couldn't have expected any reaction but that. Who could blame the boy for distrusting his enemy?

The alien felt his heart throb. Enemies. Why did they have to be enemies? Because the boy was human and Zim was an alien. Sworn to destroy each other. It seemed so rediculous now. Why had Zim even wanted to take over this planet in the first place?

Oh, that was right. The Tallest.

The Tallest had given him orders, and he was programmed to obey their every command. Wasn't he? But the Tallest never specifically said to destoy Dib... so this was okay then. But they still gave him a job to do, a very important job- he was to expand the empire and add to it's vast... why didn't he care? He could think of the orders they gave him so long ago and not feel the slightest pull to obey. He was Irken! He should have been jumping at the chance to serve!

But he wasn't. The Tallest didn't seem that important to him anymore... and why did they chose leaders by height anyway? What kind of things would that lead to? No, wait, Zim had seen what that lead to- tiny slave drones who could never be anything else. He had just barely escaped being one of those, something he was thankful for. He had managed to make it all the way to Invader. Of course that was only because he destroyed every obstacle in his way- literally. Destroyed it. Burned, flooded, melted, smashed, decimated... everything.

Guilt washed over him as he thought for the first time that this must have been hard for the people who had to clean up his mess. Tak came to mind. He held her in low respects, but why? She had escaped and come to claim what was rightfully hers. She had spirit. Zim was just a lunatic.

He shuddered, pulling at this clothes when the November winds nipped at his green skin. A lunatic. He wished he had worn something more than his hoodie and choker. Pulling the hood over his head he continued on. Abnormal. His antenna were being smothered under the heavy fabric, but at least they were warm. Twitching occasionally, they begged for freedom. Defective.

Zim stopped. No, he would use any word, any but that. A rebel, a soldier with a change of heart, yes, that was what he was. He was an Irken who felt compassion, regret, love0 but there was the problem. Felt. Irkens were not supposed to feel. They were supposed to know. Concrete facts and data were all that they processed. Calculating and going with the plan that was most likely to succeed- that was what Irkens did. Zim was no longer Irken.

Yes, he accepted that he was no longer Irken. But had he ever been? The first thing he had done when hatched was declare, 'I love you, cold unfeeling robot arm!" From the moment he had been born, he was abnormal. Perhaps being on earth just exagerated the problem. He was among those who acted like him, thus he allowed himself to blend in.

Zim looked down at his claws. They had grown a creamier shade of yellow green. Still the three-fingered alien paw that could slash anything, but they seemed... different, somehow. More real. ot just tools for destruction, but for building, holding, for caring. Perhaps that was why Zim was always destroying things. Somewhere deep down he had known that he wasn't the same, so he tried to prove himself in any way he could.

He had stopped in the middle of the sidewalk. Now he wanted to sit down. This changed things. If he was defective he was unfit for his mission anyway... so... so long as he never contacted the Tallest again... the might forget about him. A part of him wanted to protest that no one could ever forget the mighty Zim, but he knew better. That was not Zim talking. That was his Pak. Programmed for power, for glory.

Zim didn't want any of that. Figuring out what he did want, however... that would be a challange.

Continuing along and not allowing himself to think at all, Zim saw the row of shops where Carol and Tiff's cafe sat. He could hear childish laughter- Gaz must have left Gir at the shop when she came to the hospital. Zim sighed. This morning felt like an eternity ago. Slumping as he shuffled down the street, he went to pick up his robot.

_Ching._

_Click._

_Squee._


	40. So Damn Sweet

_A/N: Late and short. :'D  
Also, could any future flamers please leave a way for me to get back to them? I try to reply to all my reviews. Especially flames. And no, I don't get mad at flamers. I usually tell them they're right. -cough-_

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"Master!" chirped Gir, flinging himself into the aliens arms. With an 'oomph!', Zim caught him, holding him to his chest. 

Carol and Tiff smiled softly at him. Carol stood up and stepped forward, having been just petting the green, fuzzy little dog. "How are things going, Zim?" she asked sweetly, innocently. Tiff gave him an inquiring look, placing hand on Carol's shoulder cautiously. She had chosen to speak fewer words to Zim after the fight, but she still made it clear that she cared.

The alien sighed, subconsciously holding Gir a bit tighter. "I would rather not..."

"Oh that's okay," Carol reassured him with a smile. Tiff shifted in place. "Want anything?"

"Just a mocha," he replied. Carol nodded and smiled, going in the back room to brew him up some caffine, leaving him and Tiff alone. At first he shifted, unsure of himself, but then she sat across the table from him with a sigh.

"I think we got off on the wrong foot," she said. Zim smiled at her.

"You're a brilliant young woman, you know. Don't give up hope in the paranormal." He stayed silent for a bit, then added softly, "You never know what's out there." She nodded, but kept her head down, resting it in her cupped hand.

"I've just been... stressed as of late. There's a lot of things going on right-" she sneezed into her elbow, causing Zim to step back in fear of the germs, but she continued, "-right now. Carol say's I'll make myself sick if I keep worrying." Her fake cracked into a smile and she gave a broken laugh that sounded like half a sob. "She's always so sweet..." Her voice cracked and she buried her eyes in the palm of her hands.

"She's just so damn sweet."

Concerned, Zim sat down across from her. Something about it seemed familiar, the way she acted. "Hey... Tiff, hey. Come on," he prodded, trying to get her to look up. She did, but her eyes were wet.

"I hope you don't mind, I added some mint, for the holidays," said Carol, intruding suddenly from the other room. Tiff's head shot up and wiped her eyes, turning around to smile at the red-head. "You two doing okay?" She gave an expectant look at her friend, then looked to Zim, handing him his coffee.

"We're fine," he answered, sippnig the drink. It barely teased his tounge with it's burn, sweetness too overpoweringly good. Gir whined, and smiling, the alien looked up to him and raised the cup so he could get a sip.

Carol looked relived. "That's good. Any news?" she asked absentmindedly, forgetting Zim's previous answer. He assumed that she was under some stress too. Looking to Tiff, he sighed and shrugged.

"Well, actually-"

Suddenly a TV in the corner caught his eye and he gasped aloud at the familiar face there.

_"The professors son-"_

_"No questions, please."_

_"Would you tell us-"_


	41. Ring the Bells

"Will you leave us alone?!" shouted a girl, who looked about thirteen but Zim knew to be younger, purple hair fraying in discomfort. Her face was plastered onto the TV, dried tears visible even through the fuzzy screen. 

"No more questions," commanded the professor, placing a firm hand on his daughters shoulder and leading her away from the barrage of cameras.

"Well, it appears the Membrane family is very distressed here at Citizens Hosptial International. Rumors of the professors son, often rumored to be crazy because of his fanatical views on aliens, recovering from his coma. New details tonight about the tragic car accident that left "Dib" in a coma and quadrapalegic, confined to a hospital bed." The way the reporter chirped made Zim sick, but the girl in the background being lead out by her father made him tense up. Gaz, the poor human child.

"Zim, did you hear that!?" inquired Carol excitedly, her attention turned to the TV as soon as Zim's had. "Dib is awake!" She gasped, "You should go see him!"

Zim looked down and shook his head. "That's sort of why I'm here, I did see him." He shifted uncomfortably, Gir on his shoulders suddenly feeling much too heavy. The robot was sipping the mocha obliviously.

"What did he say?!" she squealed. Zim look to Tiff. She was as wide-eyed as her friend, although with more caution and softness and... understanding to her look.

Zim stared at his feet once again as shame overtook him. No, he couldn't relay to them the things that were said. He couldn't admit that he had failed. He could not fail. It was engrained in him, as deep as his Irken heart. "It will... take time," he answered. Gir licked at his face, seeming to sense the sadness dripping off of him.

Carol seemed to understand at once. "Oh, I'm sorry," she consoled.

Tiff looked up at him empathetically. "Good luck with it, Zim. I really mean it." He caught her gaze. Somehow, she knew this feeling, this trembling hope, tinier than a sparrow caught in the threads of a heart. He found a new respect for the blond.

He nodded to tell them it was okay. "I came to pick up my robot. You two got to meet Gaz?" They both nodded silently: Carol because she felt bad for prodding and didn't wan't to go too far again, and Tiff because she wasn't feeling too talkative at the moment. "Get along?" They nodded again.

"She seemed really quiet," Carol noted.

ZIm actually laughed. "Oh, trust me," he said, "She's usually quite the opposite. This has just been hard on her. I'm surprised she's taken it so well so far, actually. I'm kinda proud of the worm-baby." They both gave him strange looks, and he wondered why for a minute. "Oh, worm-baby... uh, it's my nickname for her. Mhm. She hates that name, but I hardly call her that anymore. Doesn't fit her." Carol shrugged and nodded, wiping a missed stain on the coffee table. Tiff gave him an inquiring look, but still said nothing.

"So Zim," Tiff finally said, breaking the ensuing silence, "What are you going to do now?"

Zim sighed as he took his mocha back from Gir and finished it off. "Go find her, I suppose. I don't think Dib would want to see me anymore today." They both nodded, Zim thanked them, and they said their goodbyes. Gir's was especially enthusiastic.

"BYYYEEE LADIES!!"

Zim chuckled and decided to head off to... where would Gaz and the Professor be? Home, maybe? Yes, he supposed it wouldn't hurt to look there first. So off he set for Dib's house, but not before sendnig the green dog inconspicuously rocketing home.

The wind nipped at his olive green skin as he walked, reminding him that the Holidays were coming up. He wondered how there could be a celebration when things still looked so dire. Ah well. The only thing Earth had more of that stupidity was hope. In the distance he caught a woman in red, ringing a bell at a store front. Every once in a while, people would stop in front of her.

_Chime._

_Step._

_Bring._


	42. I Dont Hate You

_A/N: Because I'm a spineless prick and yet I can't actually bring myself to write more, I'll give you more updates. Just pretend that they're all rolled into one, kay? Please?_

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He had searched Dib's house. No one there. He had searched the arcade, thinking of Gaz. No one there. He had asked for Membrane at the Professors labs. No one there either. So at the end of the day, after exhaustion had worn at his muscels and cold at his bones, he decided to go back to the hospital again, to see if Dib would be a bit more recpetive after the nurses had explained things to him.

He was still shivering as he entered Dib's room. The nurses had cleared out and that boy was left, the radio tuned to some stupid pop station, and the TV off. Dib was staring blankly at the ceiling. Like a zombie.

Zim switched of the radio. "Hey," he said once the silence had time to seep into Dib's ears.

"Why did you kiss me?"

Zim looked at Dib. His irises, a shining gold, pierced his Irken soul, but his head wasn't turned towards the Irken. Dib was straining to see him at all. He couldn't even turn his head. Zim did it for him, gently taking his chin and tilting it to the side. Dib resisted the urge to try and bite Zim's lingering fingers as he did.

"Why?" His voice was so tiny. Zim looked down at his boots. Why did the humans voice have to be so tiny and worn? Zim didn't even know how he WAS talking. He assumed it was because enough oxygen escaped up through the breathing tube in his neck.

"I thought you were going under again. You had woken up before and then slipped away from us... I didn't want..." he trailed off, swallowing thickly. They stayed in silence for a minute, Dib looking at him, clearly expecting more.

'Come on," his eyes said. "My greatest enemy, the mighty Irken, who wants nothing more than to see me laying dead on the floor, sees me wake from a coma, and the first thing he does... is kiss me?'

"Better to watch me... die when I could feel it?" he rasped. Zim's face changed to concern. "Out of luck, Irken." His voice broke off and his face paled, his eyes squinching shut for a moment as he clenched his teeth. Zim instinctively put a hand to his forehead and Dib tried to squirm away, once again finding his body numb and useless. He looked up with a glare at Zim, as if it were his fault.

"You're going to wear yourself out if you don't quit it," the alien said softly. Dib shut his eyes tight and wished he would answer, go away, or both. Then suddenly he felt a pressure on his cheek, and his eyes snapped open as he realized what it was. He wanted to gasp, or make some sort of noise, but was too shocked to make the effort. Zim was kissing him on the cheek.

Green lips finally pulled away and sighed. "I don't hate you."


	43. A Talk

_A/N: There, its a long chapter. Now please, no more flames personally attacking me for having a different writing style. If you don't like the story, just avoid it. And on a lighter note, thanks to all my readers- I just got my 400th review this past week, and I've got over 35,000 hits! Love to you all, and much thanks, - Dae_

* * *

Dibs heart pounded in his ears. At first, he looked to the Irken with contempt, disbelief... but then raw shock and horrow overtook him. Zim was a terrible liar. Zim wouldn't have been able to lie like that. Zim wouldn't have been able to kiss him for the sake of a facade. So it must've been true... he must have wanted to... 

Dib was left speechless and wide-eyed. ZIm looked down at him, something terrible settling in the pit of his stomach. It felt like a black whole, eating him to emptiness. He knew Dib would react this way. He knew it. But should it really come as such a shock? "Dib, think about it," he sighed. "I could have killed you so many times over these years. But I never did. I hated you, once; I hated this entire planet enough to want to crush it and destroy it, but I never did. I adjusted. It... it grew on me. _You_ grew on me. Without me even realizing it." He looked up hopefully at Dib's eyes. Blank shock stared back.

"I changed, Dib. I changed. I saw you on the ground and I... I didn't want to gloat. My enemy, the one who had stayed with me, who saw me as something, who I saw as something, was in trouble. It was like half of me was there on the ground. I couldn't leave you there, I followed. I didn't even know why I did it, but I had to..." He shook his head and looked to Dib again. "This isn't making sense, is it?"

Dib tried to shake his head, once again forgetting his condition for a moment, before he mouthed, 'No.' He couldn't strain himself with any more words.

Zim looked away. "You scared me, Dib. For once in my life I was scared. Invaders don't get scared. Invaders don't have fear, or regret, or shame, or lo- or anything. Invaders need no one." He turned to see Dib staring at him in utter confusion. His hair was frazzled, ruffled, and his bandages askew, no doubt from all the prodding the nurses must have done. He was a mess. "This must be a lot for you all in one day. I should leave..." mumbled the Irken.

Dib frantically mouthed, 'No!' No, he wanted to understand what Zim was getting at. It looked like he... pitied the human. And if that was the case, maybe he could use it to find out more about the Irken race. Maybe he wouldn't be useless after all.

Zim smiled at him gratefully. "Alright. I'll stay. Let me get a sandwich though. I'm getting hungry, and it's getting late." Dib mouthed an okay, and Zim slid out of the room, walking quickly to the cafe and leaving Dib to his thoughts.

This was certainly unexpected. The nurses had explained the car crash, which had come as a slight shock- Dib had always imagined himself getting heroicly wounded and then rising up again to battle against the alien menace and save the world, et cetera, but a simple accident... a hit and run, no less. No one ever found who had hit him. He had sped off some time before the ambulence arrived. Probably a good thing, too, if Zim was... well, he almost seemed protective. The nurses had also told him that yes, the green boy had been in every single day to see him.

It was a strange feeling. The world seemed upside down, and yet, he was fairly calm. He half assumed this to all be another dream anyway, like the ones he had early, sometimes swirling in the blackness. Or maybe those weren't dreams- he had just assumed he was crazy for imagining Zim kissing him. And saying things that he couldn't remember quite right. Like he was underwater, just barely hitting the surface long enough to breath before the current pulled him under again.

Dib wished he could see outside. He could indeed tell that it was getting late from the way the room slightly darkened, but he wanted to see outside. The stars. He wasn't sure they would be there. Everything was so crazy, it seemed as if they wouldn't be. He could hear his heart moniter beeping in the background. He wished Zim would get back soon. He didn't want to spend his days alone.

Zim slipped back into the room with a BLT and a mocha in hand. "Dib-thing?" He saw the humans golden eyes dart to him, and smiled. Pulling up a chair so he could sit right next to the boy, he set his food on the endtable beside his bed. "So," he smiled softly, "I left a message at your home, your sister might show up in a little bit. Did you want to talk about anything before she got here?"

'Food?' Dib mouthed, looking over at Zim's sandwich. The Irken was a little surprised. "You get nutrients pumped right to your stomach, Dib-thing. You don't need it."

'Food,' he insisted, opening his mouth like a baby bird. If Zim was genuinely pitying him, he didn't mind. Normally he would have balked at the very idea, but this didn't seem like Zim. Not the Zim he knew, anyways. The Zim he knew would have run him through when he was down, weeks ago in the street on a warm fall day.

Zim rolled his eyes and tore off a small chunk, placing it in the boys mouth. To his surprise, Dib chewed, savoring the taste of the food, and then mouthed 'lift my head'. Zim did so, and Dib did the best he could to swallow without choking. He gave a satisfied smile as Zim layed him back down on the pillow. He wouldn't mind this all that much, he suppsed. He didn't really trust Zim yet, but it was interesting to have him tending to his needs. It was almost sweet.

_Beep-beep._

_Hum._

_Click._


	44. Winter Blues

_A/N: I can't really apologize enough for the break. A lot pf person things cropped up, and I lost motivation. But no more excuses, this story is coming to a close and I'm not leaving you hanging any longer. Hope you enjoy the continuation of Things We Took for Granted._

* * *

Everyone was amazed at how well Dib reacted. Apart from his initial freak out, everything appeared to be fine. Zim visited as often as he could, bringing books, food, and the latest gossip to the bed-ridden boy. It wasn't long before Thanksgiving, and all the turkey themed fanfare that went with it.

Dib rolled his eyes at the mention of a holiday about being thankful. What did he have to be thankful for anyway? And Zim's persuasion had no effect on him. "Come on," he pleaded, "at least admit that there's SOME good in this world. Isn't that what you fought to protect all your life?"

Dib sent a glare his way. Zim usually knew better than to bring up the past. The subject was dropped, although Zim did sneak in some turkey to share with Dib. That had become their ritual. Zim would sneak in food and help Dib eat, and Dib would get a taste of some real food. The nurses never caught wind of it, or if they did they certainly didn't show it.

December hit with a chilling wind. The entire hospital was candy-striped in green and red, and winter coats were brought out all across the city. A thin layer of ice coated everything, making it very hard for Zim to get his hands on plants suitable to continue his tests. So far, all the flowers had withered after coming into contact with the Irken substance, but with the cheer of the holiday season, Zim couldn't bring himself to be depressed. Everyone seemed to be getting into the spirit. Dib's bedside table was overflowing with get well cards from Minimoose and Gir.

But Dib was still confined to his bed. It had been months since the accident, and almost a month since Dib had woken up. Zim had expected to make at least a little progress by now. And the doctors were useless. They repeatedly told the professor his boy would have no chance of ever walking again. In turn the proffessor told them that anything was possible with science. While no one was quite sure what he was planning, there were always rumors flying around.

Carol and Tiff still remained Zim's confidants, although sometimes he wished to know a bit more about them. He had never felt the need to bond with another being until he came to Earth. He had found it strange how they allied for no apparent reason, but once he had experienced it, he knew. And he wanted to be there for them as much as they were for him. Because it was quickly becoming apparent that they were both not as happy as they seemed.

No one was really truly happy at that time. Gaz was having a hard time adjusting to living without her older brother. The Proffessor only became more absorbed into his work as time went on. Dib was definately not used to having someone taking care of him like a helpless newborn.

And Zim was going through changes of his own. His body continued to develop, and he grew taller than Dib would have been. However, he figured that once his growth spurt was over it would be over for good. He was technically an adult by Earthly standards. He grew taller, more aware, and the soft black hairs coating his head fell out and began replacing themselves with stark platinum blond. When he first showed Gaz she only laughed at him, but eventually he grew into the idea and Gaz admitted it wouldn't look half bad. His skin darkened somewhat, loosing some of it's green pigment and turning more and more tan in color. It was still a light olive, but Zim feared he would soon be completely human. Exposure to the human chemicals had mutated his organs somewhat, and extended periods of time without a Pak were only helping it along. He could no longer call himself fully Irken.

Yet he didn't stop. He knew he was loosing himself, but every time he thought about it he wondered what was so good about old Zim anyway. A fearless fighter, yes, but so brazen and stupid! And what would he gain from taking over Earth? Glory from two leaders who had always hated him... and knowing that he had betrayed Dib. He might have been able to do it years ago, when he first landed, but... he had always enjoyed his battles with the Dib. The little human had always proved an object of fascination.

But as Zim became less and less himself, so did Dib. Laying in that hospital surrounded by pale sheets and bandages seemed to drain the like right out of Earth's hero. He barely acknowledged the passing of Christmas, and merely scoffed when Zim came in smiling on New Years day.

"Come on, Dib, it's a new year! Things are going to change this year," encouraged the half-alien. Dib gave a soft glare in response.

Zim begged, "Cheer up! I know it looks hopeless, but... it's just the winter blues. Trust me, things will be better come spring time."

Dib just rolled his eyes.


	45. Valentines

It was February. The snow had nearly all melted, and the trees were begining to bud. With the new season came new hope for Zim. And new determination. He spent every waking moment in his lab, mixing and manipulating chemicals. He figured altering the nanobots structure to mimic more Earthly cell structures would be the key to his success. And when he wasn't in the lab he was with Dib, trying to cheer him up.

Dib's room was now practically overflowing with cards and drawings from Gir and Minimoose. Several of them were flowers, appropriate for the onset of spring. However, Zim had a special card he wanted the boy to have.

Gently knocking on the sliding glass door, Zim entered the humble white room. "Hey, Dib," he smiled, shutting the door behind him. He made his way over to the bed to see a very bored Dib. The radio was humming a cheery love song, which he appeared to be tuning out. "Know what day it is?" Zim smiled, shifting form on foot to other and trying his best to look casual.

Dib rolled his eyes. "Oh come on, have a little spirit!" the alien chirped nervously. Dib mouthed an unenthusiastic 'woo'. Zim shifted in place. "Please, Dib?" He scratched the back of his neck nervously, claws brushing his feathery locks. Dib gave a noncommittal eye roll again.

Maybe this hadn't been such a great idea. Zim shook his head and began to mumble nervously. "Um, Dib, I... Well..." He bit his lip, urging himself to spit it out! and not sound like an idiot. "You've probably guessed this, but I'm, ah, a little in love with you."

Dib cursed his heart moniter as it sped up for a blip, but then he forced himself to calm down. Yeah, he knew. From the way Zim always fed him and always seemed so eager to waste his days at his bedside, it was practically written all over him.

"And it is Valentines Day, so," Zim continued, "if you don't mind that is... I'd like to be your valentine." His voice softened amd waivered as he finished his request.

Dibs raised eyebrows said it all. 'Why?' he mouthed, looking somewhere between disgust and bewilderment. Zim bit his lip and began nervously playing with his hair.

"Well I... you were sort of... you helped me to see things. You made an invader, programmed from birth, question what he was told. And it was because you never gave up. I wanted to know how a human could have such determination when he was clearly getting nowhere. An Irken would give up with the knowledge that his chances of success were low, but you've managed to keep fighitnig no matter what. And I wanted to be like that. I wanted to be more. My leaders never cared. I was too blind with loyalty to see, but after I saw how they all treated you, I began to see how they treated me. I... can't really explain. After three years on Earth I-"

The door suddenly slid open, causing Zim to jump nearly a foot. "Oh, am I interrupting anything? I'm just here to give Dib his bath." It was a nurse, pushing a cart with various soaps and disinfectants. Bath was a loose term.

"N-no," Zim sputtered quickly, looking Dibs way. He appeared wide eyed and stunned for a moment, but he melted back into the tired mask he had kept for months now. Zim frowned. "Should I leave?"

The nurse chimed before Dib could gesture, "Well, you two are such great friends, if you want to I suppose you can but I don't think Dib would mind. Huh, Dib?" He blinked a few times, a bit surprised at her forwardness. But after months of disuse his voice box was useless in his throat, and so he just mouthed a hesitant 'no'.

"See, he doesn't mind," she smiled, "You're fine."

As Dibs wrapping came off, Zim couldn't help but bit his lip at the colorless pale some of his skin had taken on and gasp as some worse things were exposed. Lesions, bruises and other spots of unhealthy fushia ran along his limbs. Where the bedsheets were constantly pressed up against were the worst. Almost half a year of being in the same place had done some serious damage. The nurse appeared to be concerned too. She eyed one of his legs. "We were hoping that would clear up..." she mumbled. "We'll have to examine that after it's washed."

As more of the wrappings came off, Zim got a bit more anxious. "You're sure you're okay with this, Dib?" he asked again. Dib gave him a neutral look, but Zim still kept the worry in the back of his mind. He adressed the nurse, still unwrapping, "Shouldn't he bit a bit more healed? It's been months."

She continued, exposing more of Dibs thighs. Zim looked away. She answered cautiously, "Well, he was healing up, but we had to keep rebandaging him because his system isn't running at a hundred percent. And staying in one place so long... that can do a lot of damage. Even if he were to be miraculously healed and out of bed right this second, his legs have atrophied for six months."

Zim quickly glanced at Dib. He was glaring at the woman for talking about him as if he wasn't there. "So..." he turned to face her, looking away with a light blush from Dibs exposed body. "So if... he were to be healed, it would still be..."

"An uphill battle, yes. Alright, now I know you can't feel this, but I'm going to start on your legs now." Dib snapped his jaw, which now had the habit of going slack. It seemed disuse was doing more harm than the crash. Zim prayed he would find the cure soon. Dib was running out of time.


	46. Everything is Fine

Transferring Dib from one bed to another was one of the most unnerving processes Zim had ever had to watched. He insisted he was there, for Dib. And he was there indeed, stroking the boys face and eyeing the nurses closely. He didn't quite trust them with this delicate task. One wrong move and they could further destroy his spinal cord and ruin any chance of recovery.

But they did indeed tranfer him, cords, IV and all, to the operating table, and quickly wheeled him out. Zim followed slowly, knowing he could only go as far as the OR door. Gaz was waiting for him there, head bowed in defeat. As he approached her, she let out a mirthless chuckle. "Defeated by bedsores. Heh."

There was nothing the doctors could do to save his legs. Atrophied beyond repairs and covered in lesions, the only safe option was amputation. Gaz had cried at the news. Dib had too, although the only signs were wetted cheeks and his knitted eyebrows. For Zim it was only affirmation that he could waste no more time. He had worked on the formula all that night, then come strait to the hospital to rally around Dib before the operation.

Now standing at the OR door he could remember nothing but Dibs pained face as the olivine claws stroked his wan cheek. Promising that everythnig would be alright, and that he would give him his legs back somehow. He felt powerless now that Dib was gone. Six months of work had given way to no breakthroughs. Every specimen he tested with the modified nanobots died, mutated, or at best did nothing. Yet he had still comforted the boy and told him it would be alright.

He knew Dib didn't believe him.

"You two need to step out into the waiting room, please," chided a nurse as she hurried past. Gaz exhaled slowly in frustration and did what she was told. Zim gave a soft shiver and followed.

"It... it'll be a few hours, Gaz." They stepped into the waiting room and Zim coaxed, "Maybe we should get out of the hospital to clear our heads."

"If something happens I want to be here."

He could detect the determination and the sorrow in her voice. He sighed, "If... you know it won't change anything..."

"I don't care."

Her eyes were dead set on the door as she sat in the nearest chair. Zim stood by her side. "Gaz." She didn't look up. He decided not to push her anymore than he had to. It was, after all, her own brother. "I'm going to go work some more, then. I'm really close."

"You've been really close."

He faltered for a moment. "T-this time I'm sure. I'm mimicing human protiens in the surrounding fluids and the nanobot structure is more like-"

"I don't care. Go work on it."

Zim frowned to himself and silently retreated. He would have a few hours before Dib was out. And he trusted Dib would be out safely. The doctors knew what they were doing for the most part. Zim just hoped he knew what he was doing.

When he finally looked up from his work, Zim yelped and jumped up, nearly knocking over his latest batch. "Shit," he mumbled, tearing off his lab coat and dashing out of the lab. Dib would be out in a few minutes. And even if he took the voot he would still probably be late. Gaz would kill him... and Dib. He had to see Dib.

He rushed off immediately, horrified to find himself huffing only a few blocks after he had gone out the door. Without his Pak to aide him and his daily routine of chase with Dib, he had grown... sedentary. Nevertheless he forced himself to run, until his heart was pounding in his chest and he was forced to stop before he collapsed. The hospital was miles away still. He would have to take the bus there...

He burst in to see a perfectly normal waiting room. The clock said Dibs surgery should have ended a half hour ago. But when he looked to the door it appeared as if Gaz hadn't moved at all. He shuffeled over to her nervously. "You're late," she chided. "If the surgery was on schedual Dib would be up by now and you would have missed him."

His face immediately turned to concern. "Is something wrong?"

"No, they said it's just... more bleeding then they thought. They said everything's fine." Her vioce cracked mid-sentance and she looked down. Her fingers began to twitch and she nodded to herself as if reaffirming that statement.

"Is he going to be okay?"

"Everything's fine," she mumbled, not believing it herself. It took Zim a moment to realize that she was wiping away tears on her sleeve. A comforting embrace was quickly given to her.

Zim attempted to comfort her and assuage his own fears. "Dib's strong, he'll make it out of there. The doctors are right, everything will be just fine... Everything is just fine."


	47. In Ruins

Colors swirled in his vision, lights bursting from all directions. Muffled voices sounded in his ear like gunshots, clanking equipment and-

Darkness.

After swirling in the undercurrent, holding his breath for what felt like a million years too long, something emerged from the murky water. An olivine blur, like he wa swimming through pond scum, only he felt nothing when he kicked his legs...

His legs...

Dib awoke to a noseless cresson face staring down at him, furrowed in concern. "How are you feeling?" Zim asked softly. Dib opened his mouth to say okay, but nothing came out and he once again realized that he had no lung function. In a sudden burst of realization he looked down. The blankets abruptly sloped off where his knees should have been, revealing an empty space where his legs should have been.

Zim must have seen him look, or at least noticed the unshed tears in his eyes. A mossy green claw quickly made it's way down to stroke his cheek. "It's okay," he whispered sweetly, "it'll all be okay, Dib." He wiped away the wetness seeping from his lids. Dib tried desperately to shake his head, to cry 'no!', but he knew it was too late anyway. Nothing his father or the doctors could do would be enough now.

He didn't even stop Zim when the alien leaned down and planted a kiss on his cheek. Nor did he protest when Zim sank to his knees, resting his head beside his on the hospital spread. And we welcomed the oh-so-gentle nuzzling of Zims face against his. The last of his fighting spirit had been worn away.

And then Gaz was at his side too, hugging him to the bed. He could feel the tears run from her cheek to his. He felt them from Zim, too. The three's mingled tears made a tiny puddle behind Dib's head.

He was back in his room, he knew, but the bustling nurses seemed to have all but vanished. He tried his best to whisper out his throught to the two, but foind his voice still useless. So instead he moved his lips against Zims cheek, eventually getting him to look up from the butterfly soft caress of his lips. He pleaded silently, 'Where's dad?'

"Where's dad..." Zim repeated back at him, frowning. Gaz stiffened, and Zim lowered his head back down to rest next to him.

"He's... he's very hard at work for a cure for you..." Gaz mumbled between tears. Dib shut his eyes and didn't bother opening them again. They huddled against each other like that until visiting hours ended. Cheek against cheek, sorrow against sorrow.

When Zim finally returned home he couldn't bring himself to go back into the lab. He shuffled into his room, ignoring his demented robots' blissfully ignorant greetings. The came in after him, Gir clinging at his leg and Minimoose gently bumping against his shoulder. "What's wrong, master? Why you all sad? Does Dib need some more happy cards?"

Zim sat on the bed, sighing. Slowly he began shedding his clothes, running his claws through his stark blond hair when he got the change. "No, Dib needs more than that. He needs a cure, now." Shirtless and shivering, glad to be nearly asleep already, Zim leaned down and unbuckled his boots.

"Well you're gonna cure him, aren't you?" Gir cooed. Minimoose squeaked an encouragement. Zim flewxed his freed toes.

"Yes. Zim will cure him. I will cure him."

He spread himself out on the sheets, curling the blankets around him. It was already dark outside, and Zim was soon out like a light. And despite the loud knocking that came from his door a few minutes later, he didn't stir.

Gir let the girl in with a squeal. "Hi Gazzums!" he chirped as he clung to her leg like a child. She flinched, but slowly patted him on the head.

"Hi, Gir. Where's Zim? I need to talk to him." Gir smiled and lead her to his room. The sounds of Dib's heart moniter still played in the background of the main space. But Zims room was wonderfully quiet. Sending Gir and Minimoose out on their way, she shut the door behind her and observed the sleeping hybrid.

His skin was brownish-green, like dirty moss, but his hair was platinum blond. It seemed funny, but she supposed that with something like that, the outcome would be hard to predict. And it held two black streaks- his withered antenna, still somewhat sensative. His chest went in and out as he breathed, sharply reminding Gaz of all the things her brother couldn't do.

"This is all your fault," she whispered to the sleeping figure. "I tried not to think that way but the more time passes the more I can't help it. None of this would have happened if you hadn't stayed on your dumb planet.

"I've wanted to tell you what I think of you. You jerk. You expect that just because you caused your body to go crazy you can just suddenly change your mind about Dib? What gives you the right? What makes you think that you can just suddenly change your mind? It's not fai that you get to make up for what you've done while I sit here... while he sits there, stuck. I've wanted to say that, but when I look at you..."

Gaz sighed and sat on the edge of the bed. Zim still didn't move. "This is too hard, Zim. This is all too crazy. If you don't hurry up on that cure I don't know what we'll do. All our hope is in you now."

She sat there for a moment, then stood suddenly, walking to the door. "I wish I could hate you, sometimes," she said as she left him to his dreams. "You ruined everything."

_Beep-beep._

_Beep-beep._

_Slam._


End file.
